Too Lazy To Spoogle* (*-Space Google) | text

[whyarewehere]

[ The post drifts up onto the comms one evening, just a simple line of text to ask a simple question:]

guys, how do aliens know when other aliens are hot?

Comments

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[lovernotafighter]

[....]

Dude, seriously?

[Because he feels a little called out right now.]

[whyarewehere]

dude. seriously.

[ This wasn't about Tucker, but he supposes he can take time out of his busy day to make it about Tucker. ]

[lovernotafighter]

[As far as he's concerned, everything should be about Tucker.

Except this.]

You know I was fucking asleep when that shit went down!

[whyarewehere]

didn't you hang out with aliens in a desert or something? you've seen more of those guys than the rest of us put together.

[ All digs aside? He's being semi-serious. ]

[lovernotafighter]

I've hung out with them a lot. Kinda comes with being an alien diplomat.

[Well, hell... let's try to be civil for five seconds.]

You know what I found out? Everyone out there finds something different hot. Don't overthink it.

I also found out that I'm irresistible to anyone and everyone and that shit isn't always a good thing. And child birth fucking hurts.

[whyarewehere]

i'm gonna just take this opportunity to remind you that here i am. resisting. effortlessly.

[lovernotafighter]

Yeah, that's only because I'm not a plate of spaghetti.

[And boy, did this feel...normal. Familiar. Like what he was used to.

It was good. A tentative good. And he totally shouldn't be as grateful for it as he was.]

[whyarewehere]

i have standards!

[ Yes. Grif. Only the highest of standards. ]

[lovernotafighter]

you sure? Because I've seen your base and I'm pretty sure you don't.

[Your sister sure didn't, Grif.]