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[This isn't the first time there's been a video post on Legion's network made by a rabbit, but it is the first time the rabbit making it is six feet tall, with an accent thick enough to cut with a knoife.]

G'day, mates. I'm the Easter Bunny.

[This would be the place to insert a punchline, if this were a joke. Bunny does not insert one. Actually, by his smug smile, he seems pretty proud of the title.]

I'm gonna need to get down to Earth sooner rather than later. Gettin' dragged out here did away with most've my powers, and I need to get down to a real bush to figure out what I've still got. Who's headed planetside when?

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[ It's just, just long enough that Grif thinks he might have done A Bad Thing. For a few seconds. Oh god no he didn't mean to kill someone, why is this h-

Oh wait it's actually fine. Thank fucking God.

It still takes him longer than it should to figure out what he wants to say next. ]

Look dude, I haven't been six years old in a really long time.

[ It's... probably more earnest than he wanted to be. He's been thrown a little. ]

[Yes, mission accomplished. Bunny jumps back up, still chuckling a bit of the humor off.]

No worries mate, just havin' a lend of you. I don't expect adults to Believe anyway. It's just the kids who're supposed to be able to see us.

[Now he actually looks a little thoughtful, having gotten his prank out of the way.]

This is probably about as weird for you as it is for me, to tell ya the truth. I haven't talked to mortals this much in . . . you know, I don't think I've ever talked to mortals this much. Certainly not grown-up ones.

[He barely even gets to interact with children, and they're the only ones who're supposed to be able to see him.]

[ It's continuing. He's not backing down. He really thinks he's the fucking Easter Bunny.

And honestly, Jason is right. Grif can make all the noise he wants, but stranger things than this have already happened here. ]

Okay, fine. Easter Bunny. But what do you do? And usually I just mean superpowers, but right now I mean with the rest of your life, dude. It's kind of a one-day-a-year thing you got there.

[This is so much attitude from someone who can not have met a lot of 6-foot-tall sentient Australian rabbits.]

Well let's see. I paint eggs, can't ever let the muscle memory get out of practice. Make better chocolate than last year. Grow some flowers here 'n there. Fight the Boogeyman with Santa and the Tooth Fairy.

[It was an enormously serious affair at the time, but to a mortal, it must sound like a children's storybook. And he could go into turning the wheel of the year, bringing the seasons in their time, protecting the place where all life was born, stealing back children from fairies and monsters and hunting down the vicious things that go bump in the night -

But nah watching this bogan continue to be mad that he is who he says he is is so much funnier.]

What.

[ But it is ridiculous story book kid shit, and Grif just can't. ]

Can you run that last one by me again, you know. Dead serious?

I fought. The Boogeyman. With Santa, and the Tooth Fairy, and the Sandman, and Jack Frost.

[He says it with deliberate slowness, unable to resist the urge to brag. Even if it does sound like bedside gossamer to Grif, it was among the most serious moments of his life. So it's easy to grin over the victory.]

Stonkered 'im too. Twice, even. Along with loads a' smaller evils, before Jack even came around. And after Jack did, we took down Old Man Winter, too.

[He has to add it on. It still barely seems possible, and feels less real out here, where the change in the belonging of the seasons doesn't subtly whisper to him of a new rightness in the world.]

Serious enough for ya, mate?

...You have a justice league for mythical creatures.

To fight the boogeyman.

Oh my god.

[ Why is this his life? Why are these the things that appear in his life? ]

[It occurs to Bunny that Grif isn't taking this remotely as seriously as he should, even as a bedside tale for children, and that makes it less funny.]

Someone has to.

[He has to think for a moment, how to get this across to an adult, and a non-believer. He has to impress some seriousness onto Grif before ribbing can be fun to get back to, only because he hasn't grasped that Grif is from a world so far removed from his that the possibility of the fantastic and child friendly being real is too absurd to even approach reality.]

Y'ever think back on yer childhood fears, the ones you don't believe are real anymore? The ones you can believe aren't real?

Yeah, you're welcome for that.

[ Grif sobers, but only barely. This is a bit of a communication breakdown here, yeah. ]

I don't think we have you guys where I come from, dude.

[ Nailed it. ]

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