[video]

[manwhosoldtheworld]

Well, isn't this nice?

[Peter has a mug of coffee clasped between his hands and is wearing an obnoxiously acid green t-shirt. You can take the man out of the gym, but you can't take the gym out of the man. His tastes haven't changed that much.]

Electricity. Hot running water. Coffee. As much alcohol as I can imbibe. It's delightful.

[Yes, he does intend to take advantage of the new-found luxury.]

I would love to say that I'm shocked to be here and all those platitudes about trying to adjust, but really, this makes about as much sense as anything else that's happened to me in the last few years.

Zombie apocalypse, insane hippies with mind-control rays, people growing lizard scales... superheroes and alternate realities seems like the next logical step, as far as logic has anything to do with it.

[He takes a long drink of his coffee.]

Oh yes. You can call me Peter. I'm... A Runner, entertainer, part-time spy and occasional meat shield. I'm sure we'll have a marvellous time together.

Comments

[steelandtemper]

A literal zombie apocalypse, then?

[Cortana is an AI, so she's broadcasting a semi-transparent hologram in blue-white, an attractive human woman with lines of computer code running along her skin and through the air around her.]

[manwhosoldtheworld]

[Well, now that's something you don't see every day.She looks like something he'd expect to see in a Comansys facility.]

Oh, very literaly. Took out about 95% of the globabl population. Nasty stuff.

[steelandtemper]

Well, that's a new one. Usually people just mean the holiday shoppers are out in force.

[They have what any self-respecting pop culture junkie would think of as zombies where she's from, but she's a workaholic who finds leisure time to be suspect.]

I'm Cortana. I'm a smart AI, which means fully sapient.

[Just gonna drag any potential robot racism out in the open early, okay.]

[thedreamisdead]

Honestly, that all sounds about par for the course. I believe the scales are actually an STD, you may want to get them checked for that when you go home.

[manwhosoldtheworld]

I'm pretty sure the scales were due to experimental treatments to regrow the parts of my body that were eaten by the undead, but I'll take that under advisement.

[kickpushbaby]

Dude, yeah! It's freakin' awesome here, you get your own toothbrush, and a room and everything!

Is Peter your superhero name? Are you like a drug runner or like a jogger runner?

[manwhosoldtheworld]

Well, it does beat sharing tents, that's for sure.

No. Peter is my name name. My superhero name is... well, a joke someone I know made once that sort of came true. And I'm a jogger type runner. Mostly. I can't deny there have been a few times drugs have been involved, but the constant is the running.

[goddamngrenades]

Hippies with. Mind control rays. I- okay even for me, that is way, way out there. What the hell?

[manwhosoldtheworld]

Well, it was less a ray and more... covertly drugging much of the population through the use of an energy drink. Or it was before the apocalypse. After the apocalypse it was a satellite emitting a specific tone. Thankfully it was stopped.

[ofmightandmeta]

Alcohol is for everyone.

[Yes, that's the one thing he's going to take away from this. You don't threaten a man's alcohol supply.]

[manwhosoldtheworld]

Of course it is. I think even I would have trouble drinking all of it. Besides, recovering from fatal alcohol poisoning is rather unpleasant.

[whyarewehere]

What do you mean by runner?

[ Grif is trying to suss out whether or not there's a new speedster on the block. This Peter guy didn't exactly give them the business on what his superpower is, and that's Grif's number one priority in any conversation with a new person. ]

[manwhosoldtheworld]

I mean... the usual sort? I run places. And away from the undead. Runners get sent outside the walls of the settlement to collect supplies, deliver messages, help to take down a corrupt fascist government...

Video

[araignee_du_soir]

That is certainly a collection of tales... and skills. Though, I an curious: what kind of entertainer are you?

Video

[manwhosoldtheworld]

I was an actor.

[He deflates a little.]

Well, really I pretended to bring zombies back to life in a sort of... post-apocalyptic theme park. It was incredibly tacky. But needs must.

[bachido]

Welcome to Legion, Peter!

My name is Kubo, son of the Mighty Beetle. They call me Paperboy. I'm also an entertainer! I tell a story every day at the midday meal, when there's not a mission.

I was glad when I came here, too. We didn't have electricity or running water in my home, either. What sort of entertainer are you? Have you found a performance space yet? I can help you look for one if you need to!

[manwhosoldtheworld]

[Oh lord, there are children here?

And that... that is a tricky question when he feels like he should be attempting to be some sort of good role model. He's never been a good role model in his life.]

Is that because you lost the water and electricity or did they just not have it? And I... don't think this place really has the equipment I would need to do my performance. It was incredibly tacky anyway.

[calibrates_big_guns]

And here I thought my life was eventful.

[A sardonic remark from what appears to be a tall, lanky, raptor-like alien with a carapace and facial scarring.]

[manwhosoldtheworld]

[That is definitely new. Alright, so maybe he can't be as blase about everything as he normally would be.]

I think there's a curse in my world which is something like 'may you live in interesting times'.

[died_a_virgin]

I didn't have a zombie apocalypse...but I did have to deal with Nazi Vampires.

[manwhosoldtheworld]

...why is it always Nazis? You never see creepy clandestine supernatural organisation emulating Attila the Hun.

[muroieda]

I know, roight?! The developed world never loses its charm.

I'll never get tired of fresh water. Never!

[His own appearance may give some unspoken context to the complete disregard to the whole "zombie, lizard scales, and mind control, oh my!" thing.]

[manwhosoldtheworld]

Fresh water. Definitely a perk that you miss when the taps no longer work. Hot showers.

[lovernotafighter]

Back the fuck up: Zombie Apocalypse?

[manwhosoldtheworld]

That's what I said. it was all very Romero.