Voice

[goddamngrenades]

[ Roughly fifteen, twenty minutes after Amercia's very helpful Anti-Sugar PSA (the more you know and all that Jazz) a random joke has become a thing. Out of...if not spite, but a desire for mischief. ]

Who's up for a bake-off? It's a mini competition where you, well, bake your best pie or cake or cookies or pastry or whatever you like, as long as baking is involved somehow, and submit them to categories of some kind to be judged and awarded prizes. Bragging rights are mostly what you get out of it, but- I figure we can have a little scientific application here. The Categories will be Baked with Artificial Sweeteners, Baked with Natural sugars- apples, cherries, letting fruit do the work and stuff- and Baked with good old fashioned sugar.

And a bonus category for baking while baked something that'll get you baked, if you get my meaning. Apparently it's entirely legal in some sectors in the vegan space future- or at least variations on the same. Who knew? Let's double dip in vices.

Totally not connected to the whole 'sugar is evil' thing, nope, not even a little. This is some good, clean, spite free fun. Honest. Is this the voice of a man that would lie to you?

Bring on your baked goods and, uh- I'm gonna need some volunteers to help as judges. Actual Judge experience not required.

Comments

[goddamngrenades]

I'm sure if we poke America we can get a proper Anti-Drug PSA out of her. Or Captain America, that seems like his bag.

[ A strange bag, but a solid bag none the less. ]

[smarterthandad]

Cap only cares if you're hurting someone. He'd probably just tell people to be careful.

[He's much more live-and-let-live than people seem to realize.]

[goddamngrenades]

That is remarkably chill of him. Maybe a 'use responsibly' PSA, because we are going to be responsible about this.

[smarterthandad]

Look, when you're constantly fending off extradimensional invasions, caring about people who are only hurting their dignity and a few bags of Doritos is a low priority.

[goddamngrenades]

Sometimes I get this insane itch to want and go where y'all are from and then I get over it because, seriously, the weirdest problems. You have them.

[smarterthandad]

I honestly don't know what everyone else in other universes does with their time. Crosswords? Video games?

[ordinarily]

Definitely video games.

[goddamngrenades]

Smart AI experimentation and an alien invasion that's been going for a decade or so. But other than that, yeah. Video games.

[ordinarily]

... How come everyone else gets to have aliens in their universe, and I'm just stuck with annoying ghosts in the basement?

[goddamngrenades]

Kid, I'd take ghosts in the basement over a war that's defined two generations. Wanna trade?

[ordinarily]

You say that now.

Give it a week.

[goddamngrenades]

Ghosts over alien invasion. I'll take it.

[hepunchedhitler]

I think the last time I had to deal with something like that, it was when the Tzin were giving people narcotic-based superpowers in an attempt to turn the entire human race into easily-conquered drug addicts.

[goddamngrenades]

You have the weirdest problems.

...so in contrast people just getting snuggly and eating too many sweets is a cakewalk.

[hepunchedhitler]

As long as it's legal and it's used responsibly, I don't see what the issue would be. I'm not a fan, personally, but I don't have to indulge.

[goddamngrenades]

Or you could team up with little golden wonder here and judge the regular categories and not the bonus. I mean, that'd be a ringing endorsement, right? Captain America likes my pie?

[hepunchedhitler]

Sounds like a good way to insure that everyone only does apple pie.

[That's not a 'no'.]

[goddamngrenades]

There are a lot of ways you can do apple pie. Pretty sure blatant judge pandering is bad form, though.