[video, after murderworld]

[headinjuries]

[ Today on your omnicom: a slightly baffled looking Sam, sitting cross-legged on one of the common area couches with a soda and half a bowl of popcorn. ]

'K, so.

Remember how Chief went back home for like two minutes, but got back here months later?

I guess it works both ways, because I was definitely back for a while but I'm like 95% this is the same splatterball game I was watching right before I went.

[ He stops to eat a handful of the popcorn, and - ]

- wow, yeah, this stuff didn't even have time to get cold.

So, you know. In case anybody was wondering.


(ooc: it'ssss a canon update. Sam's about current now, up to right before Champions starts - which means that if you're avoiding Civil War II spoilers, give me a holler and I'll make sure not to tag you with any!)

Comments

[turntex]

but what if theres not a home to go back to
like are we exempt or extra particularly fucked or what

[Because he genuinely has no idea what he'd get sent back to in that situation. The planet they'd meant to take up residence on? Paradox space? Like did he miss the bus on getting to a new universe or would he actually get back to his friends? That could be either awesome or completely godawful. This seems like a legitimate thing to be concerned about.]

[headinjuries]

I...have no idea.

I get the feeling the only way we're gonna get an answer is if it actually happens.

[ The Time Trapper does not seem big on Explaining Himself. ]

[turntex]

well shit
okay
so howd that fight go

[Dave Strider, master of subtle subject changes.]

[headinjuries]

I won.

[ Let's not talk about how bad getting there was. ]

[turntex]

has anyone ever told you youre an enthralling storyteller

[headinjuries]

Okay, fine.

I won and I don't remember how very well because I got Hulkpunched halfway around the world and had memory problems for months. Better?

[turntex]

i mean its no pulitzer nominee but its still a vast improvement
hell youre even starting in media res and all that shit
look at you taking literary risks

[headinjuries]

It's my life, not a freaking comic book.

[turntex]

yeah and youre doing a shit job of telling me about it
how are we ever supposed to become bros if youre not willing to open up to me
youre breaking my heart here babyface

[headinjuries]

Says the guy whose face I haven't even seen yet.

text ==> video

[turntex]

[There isn't an instant reply, which is odd because Dave's text replies have so far been lightning fast. It takes him a sec to figure out how to change the media settings here -- he hasn't actually used anything but text so far.

But a few moments later, Sam is greeted with a video response, Dave sitting against a metal wall somewhere. He's somewhere close to Sam's own age, blonde and pale with shades concealing half of a cool expression.]

Ta-da.

[headinjuries]

[ He wasn't actually expecting that to happen. ]

Huh.



Okay.

[turntex]

[Surprise, it's not actually all that hard to get him to stop with the text. You just gotta indicate some level of interest. Gotta make people work at least a little for the facetime.]

It's cool. I know a face like this tends to render people speechless.

[He somehow manages to talk exactly like he types: mellow and even, just bordering on completely flat and dry.]

[headinjuries]

So if I'm a babyface, what does that make you?

[turntex]

In my own defense, I'd never actually seen your face when I came up with that. It was strictly in comparison to the first Nova guy. Didn't know it was actually accurate.

[Aaaand there's a bit of a smirk. Gotta love when the universe agrees with his bullshit.]

That said, I am not the younger version of anything, save maybe an alt-universe adult self who apparently launched himself into the sun and is thus irrelevant, so I'm just a regular Dave. But I'm open to suggestions.

[headinjuries]

Maybe something that plays on the pajamas.

[turntex]

Already got a title from the pjs. Or, got the jammies because of the title. Whatever, there's a relation.

[He pinches the bottom of the front of his shirt to pull it taut and better display the symbol on it, a bright red gear.]

"Knight of Time". But yeah, I don't think that really rolls off the tongue as well as "babyface".

[headinjuries]

You know, I hear knight and I think, like...armor or something.

[turntex]

Hey, I didn't choose the outfit. Armor wouldn't have done shit against most of the baddies we were stuck with back home anyway.

[headinjuries]

What were you fighting?

[turntex]

[That is a hell of a question. Dave pauses, mouth twitching like he's not sure whether he can find hunor in this yet, and takes a breath to prepare himself for this response..]

A crazy carapacian man with pool balls for eyes, an alt-universe cyborg gangster version of that same dude, another alt-universe version of him where he was a space-warping ultimate winged-dog furry, a giant green skullmonster-puppet demon, a whole mess of mobster leprechauns with stupid superpowers, and an overpowered fish alien empress who also happened to be Betty Crocker.

[He was counting them off on his fingers as he went, and he nods as he hits the end of his list.]

Yeah, those were the important ones.

[headinjuries]

[ Sam's actually willing to accept most of that, given that he pals around with a talking raccoon with a gun fetish and a psychic Russian dog who runs a space station. So actually, the part of that that makes him double-take is - ]

Betty Crocker?

[turntex]

Yeah, the fishbitch is also the batterwitch. Apparently she conquered Earth in an alternate universe, after getting the Insane Clown Posse set up as co-presidents of America and later flooding the planet.

[Also Guy Fieri is the antichrist.]

[headinjuries]

That sounds way more interesting than "oh, it's an alternate universe where Captain America is a girl."

[turntex]

Go big or go home, I guess.

[A beat.]

Was there really a girl version of Captain America?