legionnpcs: (legion - Matter-eater lad)
legionnpcs ([personal profile] legionnpcs) wrote in [community profile] thelegion2016-09-07 02:13 am

Tinker, Tailor, Hero, Spy [Modplot/Network IC Post] [Part 2] [Set after the ambush ends]

[Things are not good -- and that's the understatement of the century. Just about everyone got walloped and the native Legionnaires were at the epicenter of that collective wumping, targeted first by the Fatal Five in the hopes that with them out of the way the rookies would be easy to pick off.]

[Thankfully, the Fatal Five were wrong. The rookies took their lumps but they held their ground.]

Matter-Eater Lad here.

[His glasses only partly hide the massive shiner he's got, and he's wearing a neck brace. Hooray. Fortunately, those are much less bulky in the glorious robot future.]

Alright, ladies and gents and variations thereupon, I think it goes without saying that what just happened was the pits. Right now, half of us more experienced Legionnaires are in Medbay and Kid Q is still trapped in a time loop, even if we've managed to relocate her to Legion World. Brainiac thinks he can fix it but he's still a mess because his personality inhibitors got blown and he has to fix those first before he can even hope to think straight again.

Everyone's respective boo boos aren't the only thing we have to worry about though. The Fatal Five knowing all our weaknesses, and some of what they said, suggested there's a mole on Legion World passing them private medical scans and tactical data. Since the Science Police had jurisdiction, they've already arrested a suspect.

[He tilts his omnicom and they can see that the Science Police are in the background, arguing viciously with Timber Wolf, Officer Erin, and Umbra, and trying to drag away a handcuffed Rocket, who's wasting no time in arguing with them, too.]

["Hey! Hey, watch the sui--what do you mean, hand over my gun? That's my gun! I mean, I got more, but it's my gun! I told you, I ain't a spy! Or a mole, or whatever stupid word you wanna use! I didn't do it!" A pause. "Do I look like a sp--yes, I know spies don't look like spies, that's whole point, but you know what I mean!"]

[Back on Tenzil's face again.]

It's totally bogus. The only evidence against Rocket they have is all digital sign-ins and video, which is so easy to doctor in this time period that a Terellian spongebeast could do it. No physical evidence or witnesses. No prints or DNA at the console he was supposedly accessing the data from. But they're not listening to us.

[Rocket has not stopped arguing in the background. "You're all assholes. Complete friggin' assholes. Have I told you that? 'Cause I feel like I should. Shouldn't you be out policing science, instead of arresting people who didn't do anything?"]

[Tenzil lowers his voice.] Which means we're gonna have to take a few things into our own hands.

[The last thing they hear from Rocket as he's dragged off is: "--and somebody remember to go water the plants while I'm dealing with this shit! I come back and they're all dead, somebody's gonna get their ass shot, then bit by a flytrap!"]

[Tenzil goes into the Legion Leader's office for more privacy.]

The chances of any of you rookies wanting to take down the entire Legion, when it means Chronoblivion would make the multiverse go kaput, are slim. We think Rocket's innocent -- and if he's not, there needs be evidence that's a whole lot more reliable before charges are brought.

Kid Q's out of the loop -- stuck in the loop as it were -- so as Deputy Leader, I'm taking charge. While the rest of us are licking our wounds, I'm organizing a team from the Legionnaires that are still standing to investigate. It'll be a private affair. No reason the Science Police need to worry their pretty little heads over any possible investigations that might be running side-by-side with their own, right?

Some good news, by the by: other than 4 Science Police officers that went down in the first blast, we had no other fatal casualties. All the delegates survived, all but the 4 Scicops made it, there were no fatalities in the crowd, and even with taking our lumps we didn't lose any teammates. The Fatal Five had everything they needed to turn the attack into a massacre that could've destroyed two governments, and taken out the entire team. You did good.

Oh, and since we have some new people with absolutely impeccable timing, welcome to the Legion. Don't mind our dust. Or the multitudinous catastrophic injuries. If you have any general questions that aren't just "Why is absolutely everyone injured?" feel free to ask.
deafleppard: (50)

[personal profile] deafleppard 2016-09-12 05:10 am (UTC)(link)
I don't know. We're in the really distant future, right?

You sure rocks haven't gotten smarter than they were in the 21st century?
whyarewehere: (L)

[personal profile] whyarewehere 2016-09-12 05:12 am (UTC)(link)
[ Grif points mutely at the screen in a gesture of "what she said". ]
deafleppard: (9)

[personal profile] deafleppard 2016-09-12 05:30 am (UTC)(link)
I'm never gonna look at them the same way again.
ringslinging: and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". (he stole me 6 pairs of undies)

[personal profile] ringslinging 2016-09-12 05:21 am (UTC)(link)
Is this where I remind everyone that the Green Lantern Corps has a sentient planet in its ranks?
deafleppard: (35)

[personal profile] deafleppard 2016-09-12 05:28 am (UTC)(link)
Why would you tell me these things.

Why.
ringslinging: like batman and sex. (i can taunt you with whatever i want.)

[personal profile] ringslinging 2016-09-12 05:30 am (UTC)(link)
Because most people find Mogo to be a slightly less ridiculous example of the diversity of alien life than Dkrtzy RRR.
deafleppard: (2)

[personal profile] deafleppard 2016-09-16 03:33 am (UTC)(link)
I have no idea what any of that means.

[story of her life.]
ringslinging: with a broke toe. they know how to fucking party on lake lanier. (i woke up smelling like chlorine)

[personal profile] ringslinging 2016-09-17 05:28 am (UTC)(link)
Dkrtzy RRR is a sentient math equation. Also a colleague.
deafleppard: (45)

[personal profile] deafleppard 2016-09-27 03:45 am (UTC)(link)
Why?!

And how?!
ringslinging: (i wish my penis had an off switch)

[personal profile] ringslinging 2016-09-27 05:15 am (UTC)(link)
You know, I've never asked.
deafleppard: (46)

[personal profile] deafleppard 2016-09-28 04:58 am (UTC)(link)
You...

Seriously? It never occurred to you that this is something that kind of stands out?
ringslinging: with a broke toe. they know how to fucking party on lake lanier. (i woke up smelling like chlorine)

[personal profile] ringslinging 2016-09-29 02:04 am (UTC)(link)
At some point I figured if I started asking questions every time I saw something weird, I'd never have time to do anything else.
deafleppard: (50)

[personal profile] deafleppard 2016-10-06 05:25 am (UTC)(link)
That's a good point.

But wouldn't you think a self-aware planet and math equation would be... a step above your average weird?

(no subject)

[personal profile] ringslinging - 2016-10-08 02:54 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] deafleppard - 2016-10-08 04:16 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] ringslinging - 2016-10-10 01:52 (UTC) - Expand
whyarewehere: (R)

[personal profile] whyarewehere 2016-09-12 06:17 am (UTC)(link)
How does that work?
ringslinging: emoji (where's the chopping off someone's balls)

[personal profile] ringslinging 2016-09-13 10:06 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm a space cop, not a biologist.
whyarewehere: (R)

[personal profile] whyarewehere 2016-09-14 02:13 am (UTC)(link)
Damn. Too bad we didn't get the space cop forensics guy.
ringslinging: she stopped and said 'wait i know this dick'. (halfway through the blowjob)

[personal profile] ringslinging 2016-09-14 03:15 am (UTC)(link)
Technically, our rings are the forensics guys.
whyarewehere: (B)

[personal profile] whyarewehere 2016-09-14 03:20 am (UTC)(link)
So much for a degree giving you job security.
ringslinging: (and you fell through a lawn chair)

[personal profile] ringslinging 2016-09-15 04:04 am (UTC)(link)
Do you really think the Guardians of the Universe would care about the educational systems of a backwater planet like Earth either way?
whyarewehere: (K)

[personal profile] whyarewehere 2016-09-16 07:14 pm (UTC)(link)
So what you're saying is that when I get out of the army I need to go to space college.
ringslinging: if they're in uniform?! serious question. (are cops allowed to hit on you)

[personal profile] ringslinging 2016-09-17 05:32 am (UTC)(link)
I hear they've got good tech schools on Ungara.
whyarewehere: (12)

[personal profile] whyarewehere 2016-09-17 10:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Do they take the GI bill, you think?
ringslinging: was "highway to the danger zone" (the first song on his sex mix)

[personal profile] ringslinging 2016-09-18 03:54 am (UTC)(link)
They might. If you explain to them what a GI is first.