Robbie Baldwin (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
walkingballpit) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
thelegion2016-09-06 12:29 pm
walkingballpit) wrote in thelegion2016-09-06 12:29 pm
[I should apologize for all posts in advance.]
[ The camera feed turns on, and it's immediately an in-focus, decently framed shot. Robbie actually has experience with selfie feeds and took the time to learn the controls before he started shooting.
The content is being winged, though, because it's really hard to screw up hello. Robbie grins at the camera. ]
The Pledge of a Legion, so that's a thing.
[ There's just enough of a rush to his voice to slur the edges of the words into "Pledge of Allegiance". Saying hi doesn't mean he can't amuse himself for a split second while testing the waters for possible temporarily-borrowed contemporaries. ]
Never actually had to vow before. Sign things, yes. This is kind of more official than I like to work, but a team's a team. You guys can help me with the future deets, and I'll start working on that new catchphrase for you.
[ And a new pledge, and a new team name, because wow. It's all so on-the-nose that it hurts, or maybe it's the smell of raw earnestness wafting around this place. He might've written up a few theoretical oaths for the New Warriors, back in the day, but he never got around to showing them to anyone. Enacting them, though, that takes consensus. Robbie doesn't think he'd have managed it.
He throws a deuce, because he'll never have another chance to confuse future alien peoples. ]
What up, Legion? Speedball in the house.
The content is being winged, though, because it's really hard to screw up hello. Robbie grins at the camera. ]
The Pledge of a Legion, so that's a thing.
[ There's just enough of a rush to his voice to slur the edges of the words into "Pledge of Allegiance". Saying hi doesn't mean he can't amuse himself for a split second while testing the waters for possible temporarily-borrowed contemporaries. ]
Never actually had to vow before. Sign things, yes. This is kind of more official than I like to work, but a team's a team. You guys can help me with the future deets, and I'll start working on that new catchphrase for you.
[ And a new pledge, and a new team name, because wow. It's all so on-the-nose that it hurts, or maybe it's the smell of raw earnestness wafting around this place. He might've written up a few theoretical oaths for the New Warriors, back in the day, but he never got around to showing them to anyone. Enacting them, though, that takes consensus. Robbie doesn't think he'd have managed it.
He throws a deuce, because he'll never have another chance to confuse future alien peoples. ]
What up, Legion? Speedball in the house.
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[Then he doesn't tell Robbie to screw himself, and he doesn't leave, and he doesn't run off to tell Vance that Robbie's a mess (as if Vance doesn't probably already have an idea).]
[Instead, he hugs him, wraps his arms around him as best as he can when he's bowed over like this. And he's relieved -- not because Robbie's upset but because if he's feeling all this, faking he's okay probably isn't that healthy. It's better it's out in the open, instead of hiding underfoot where Rich can step on those emotional landmines again and again without realizing.]
[Awkwardly hugging Robbie isn't quite enough, though, so presses a kiss to the top of his head like the rare times he'd done it when Bobby had been upset, back when they were little, when the occasional boo boo needed to be kissed too far away from the house and their mother.]
[Robbie's in that same little slot in his heart, after all. One labeled 'might-as-well-be-blood.']
Extra time is a good thing. Being able to do this [he holds him a little tighter] is a good thing, especially since we don't know for sure if I'll have to die again.
And even if I do, I'm here now. I'm here now and I can do this. I can hug you and I can remind you of how much I care about you, when that was -- [now his voice chokes up and he tears up] -- when the worst part was I wanted be able to say those things, and show you and Vance and Angel and my family how much I care, a million times more.
[It hadn't felt like enough. It still feels like he'll never have enough time for it to be enough. For them to understand how much he cares about them. Especially with all the time he's spent away from Earth.]
You don't have to pretend anything. For chrissakes, Robbie, it's not like I came back made of spun glass.
[Life is messy and Rich is used to it. Robbie doesn't have to try to make Rich happy all the time by Stepford smiling his way through it all.]
This is weird and freaky and a little bit terrifying. So if you need to be sad, be sad. You need to be scared of what'll happen after this, be scared.
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What would they do, if they had extra time? Probably not waste it kissing Robbie's hair. It's more affection that he deserves, and he knows he can't say that or explain how throws everything into overwrought and raw. He can only sniffle hard and wipe at his eyes to get himself calm - or close enough to pass - without moving away. That way, Rich will think it's working, and Robbie won't be confused because nobody actually kisses the top of anyone's head. That's not real life.
It's no good. Every muscle in his body tenses when Rich insinuates he could die again. No, he can't. He's not allowed. Robbie's already planning on finding some way to get the Trapper Keeper to fix it, and then it gets worse.
It's like he said, nothing good happens to him, but shrunk down into one conversation where Robbie can't keep up with the escalating emotions. He can't even come up with words, because it's not even all of it. Robbie hasn't had time to fully deal with what just happened back home, how he almost let the worst happen again, but he ran out of the icy adrenaline that got him through it while he was waiting in the Medbay.
He's got no insulation from the hug and the warmth of the words, and Robbie knows it all adds up to "you're my friend, and I love you, so lean on me." But he can't.
He can stand up and properly hug Rich, who has caught Robbie's upset like a virus, and rub a small circle on his back, because that's what everyone does. ]
It's okay. They know. You know they know.
[ Robbie is sure of that, and he sounds better for saying it. Here is a fact that he can present plainly, because it isn't covered in slippery emotional thorns: Rich is wonderfully unsubtle. Robbie doesn't need to call up anyone to confirm that they knew that Rich cared about them. They all knew.
And here, he's found a natural opening to move away from the hug, to get some needed space back, because he's going to do all of those things. He's going to be sad, to be scared about the day when the Trapper decides Rich isn't needed and ... yeah, he's going to pretend, too.
He claps his hand on Rich's shoulder and tries to smile, but his cheeks won't cooperate. ]
So you don't have to say them. C'mon, you were always glass. I saw right through you.
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[Rich looks a little embarassed when he sits, and he wipes at his eyes with the tips of his fingers in that way people do when they're trying to not make tears too obvious. Just clearing some dust out of his eyes, doncha'know. That's all.]
[Then he smiles, ducking his head a little bashfully.]
I guess I've never been what anyone would call subtle.
[He says it like it's not the understatement (of the century) that it is, but still looks a little bashful about it. He's always been a bull in a china shop in more ways than one, especially emotionally. In some ways it was bad (like all those times he was blunt at Nita until she smacked him one) but in some ways it was good. Robbie's right. They know. He knows they know. Having someone say it makes it hurt a little less, just like having his second chance to say all those things even more makes it hurt a little less, too.]
[He doesn't want this to be awkward anymore, and he's not sure if they can force that, but the two of them admitting at least a little sadness and fear is better than trying to pretend nothing about this is strange or scary. So, now that it's all done, he draws in a deep breath and lets it out in a little 'hoooo.']
[Then he changes the subject.]
There's a planet of triplets, you know.
[Robbie said he wanted to hear about planets here so Rich will tell him about planets. He misses the back-and-forth and he knows Robbie does, too, so alongside the emotional stuff he'll try to give him that. They'll have to go back to the upsetting stuff eventually -- he needs to tell Robbie about Nita soon, but he's got the sense that even things that could potentially bring joy and relief might also bring Robbie stress and guilt and anxiety. Just like Rich being alive means he might die again, Nita being alive and a quantum anomaly means the same. This has to be paced. Robbie needs time to breathe.]
It's all triplets. Every person on the planet. The Carggites can all split into three identical triplets. They go back and forth from being one person or three people on a whim.
[He pauses.]
And all three usually like the same things? They're all, y'know, mentally connected. So if the thing that, say, a very pretty Carggite lady likes is you specifically, that means the other two of her are equally interested.
[Of course Rich has already experienced this by now. He hasn't really done anything about it because he's not sure if "but I thought we were maybe broken up on account of I died" is an excuse Nita will accept when he gets back, but he's at least noticed that he's been noticed.]
We don't have a planet of triplets back home, Robbie. [He says this like it's their home universe's most tragic flaw.] Omnicidal cosmic space worms aside, this universe is freakin' fantastic.
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But that doesn't mean Robbie's staring. He deliberately avoids looking at his friend while Rich settles his emotions, hides his tears. Robbie thinks they have an unspoken agreement to make this as easy possible, and this includes providing an illusion of privacy when the chinks show. He thinks it's a part of how quickly they've recovered from his little moment, because Rich hasn't used any of the dumped information to attack at the weak spots.
They've both backed away, first to Rich, and then to triplets.
... forgive Robbie if his primary reaction to the story of the Carggites is jaw-dropped horror. He is imagining if the people in his life could become three, and by people, it's actually also almost exclusively the ladies (that's the scenario Rich provided, and that's what his imagination is working with).
The ladies in Robbie's life are across the board too much for him to handle. All of them. Three of them? Forget it, you might as well hold the funeral now, because nope. ]
First off, woah. Second, they have missed their chance to call themselves Triplanet, and I am trademarking Triplanet Tours and marketing it to guys like you.
[ And then the implication hits him and uh. Yeah. This is most likely the first time Robbie's had a conversation with anyone about multiple partners. ]
You - uh. [ Oh, look, here's a bush, he'll beat around it. ] Does that count if they're all the same person sometimes? Is four technically an orgy?
[ Oh my god, Rich had an orgy. He is both impressed and freaking confounded. He has completely forgotten the hot mess they both were not a minute before. Mind. Blown. ]
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[Rich waves his hands like a foul has been made but what he says next makes it clear why he's so fervently denying he has any personal experience with this.]
She was a superhero groupie type. The Carggite that was into me.
[Rich pulls a face, the 'hell no' face, because everyone knows that's diving head first into the Danger Zone, sleeping with superhero groupie types. Between the messed up power balance and the obsession, there's a whole potential minefield there -- one that could potentially end with somebody's pet bunny boiled.]
No way. Remember that girl in Toluca that wanted to give me a portrait of myself made with human hair?
[The reality show hadn't been so popular that women had been throwing themselves at their feet all that often, but of the four guys on the team, Rich had gotten a considerable share of what female attention had been directed their way. And he'd alway run right in the other direction because that fannishness
sometimesalways had gone to creepy levels. The New Warriors had not attracted what one might consider "classy" groupies.]But if she hadn't been a cape chaser, I'm just saying. Triplets.
[A pause.]
And that's a very thought-provoking question. I'm not sure what the Carggites themselves define it as, but I always thought, classically speaking [who the hell knows what "classics" he's referring to -- seventies porn? The Canterbury Tales?] that it was just...more than three participants.
[Another pause, as he sidetracks into Robbie's line of thought and gets distracted by his own curiosity. Three fingers held up become only two fingers held up] But that's three people, usually, so if it's only really technically two --
[Now he's really curious, but there's no way he's looking it up.]
I guess we'll never know the answer, though, because I am not space-googling anything resembling that question on the space internet.
[Maybe he'll ask Grif. Grif has probably space-googled many a salient, perverted question by now. Also, it'll be funny to see Rich asking the question totally destroying Grif's view of him as being Captain Virtue and all.]
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He's not laughing at Rich. Robbie likes honesty in his friends, but he finds it amusing. They're not supposed to argue when other people assume they've got tons of experience, right? They're supposed to get suave about it.
Suave isn't in the building. ]
She - they - she... the Carggite couldn't have been as bad as Toluca. That picture looked like it was going to rip through the paper and eat my soul through my eyes.
Classically speaking - what? Did Plato write some... I can't finish that with a straight face.
[ Or without blushing, but it's too late for that. Robbie's skin has already gone fairly pink, but that doesn't stop him from trying to consider the question that's still at hand: is it two participants or four? ]
I think we can space-google if the Carggites have a true hive mind or if they just have a telepathic link between them. Hive mind, two people, four bodies, not an orgy. Telepathic link, means they're like... personality subsets. Like what's his McEveryFace. Used to run X-Factor. I... really can't remember, it's been so long. I think that'd count as an orgy.
I feel like I'm supposed to be calling you an idiot either way, but... yeah, cape chaser. Does it count as cape chasing if they're also a cape?
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[A pause and then a sly grin.]
Actually, yes, but only if it's Squirrel Girl.
[Y'know, what with the fannish adoration that had been just on this side of 'Robbie needs to file a restraining order.']
[Robbie can call Rich an idiot all he wants as he pulls up his omnicom and starts tapping out "Carggites" and "telepathic link?" on space google. Now he needs to know.]
[It's amazing, how, one subject change later, things have fallen back in line with the way their relationship used to be, with the two of them being curious and stupid and doing it in a way that many could consider "cooperative." It's a group effort, really. It hearkens back to the times one of them would try to convince the other that something was yes, indeed a thing, no really, they heard it from Spider-Man.]
I thought it was a telepathic link but everything I'm reading is saying all three triplets have identical emotions, except it doesn't go into if it's a hive mind or telepathic link or what.
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No, it's because he totally kissed Squirrel Girl, and he still thinks she's sweet. He doesn't have a crush nor will it ever get off the ground as a Thing, but he still broke that unofficial rule. In his defense, Doreen wasn't that creepy about it, and he was... really flattered by the attention. Most of the fans really did go for the traditionally tall, dark, and handsome Nova over the rest.
And yes, the subject change was wondrous, but Rich picked one helluva new topic for them. There's no way to ignore Triplanet. Once it's been brought up, all previous conversation is ruined.
But this interaction feels natural to Robbie, and he's sliding down a slippery slope of friendliness and growing attachment without noticing how he's leaning across the table to see what, exactly, Rich's omnicom is showing him. Like nothing's changed. ]
See? 's all cool, you didn't turn down a chance to out Iron Man Iron Man. Just one girl. It's probably not even awesome by alien chick standards.
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[Rich doesn't see the blushing and that's possibly a good thing because he'd tease pretty mercilessly. He's still typing intently. Almost unconsciously, he registers Robbie looking over his shoulder, so he holds out his omnicom so Robbie has a better view, because they are on this educational adventure together.]
Okay, this one says that they have some kinda martial art form called tri-jutsu that has all three working together and knowing each other's moves -- but that's not necessarily telepathy. Maybe it's more they're just the same person? The best person to predict what you're gonna do next is you, right? Generally?
[He clicks through some potentially relevant links, trying to find some kind of scientific study or explanation or something.]
If we can't find it ourselves, I bet I could ask my friend Grif. He'd definitely know on account of he's a generally depraved and curious person.
And since even he talks about me like I'm some squeaky clean Captain Righteous type, one inch away from wrapping myself in a flag, if he pulled a total 180 and tried to tell anyone I was asking perverted questions, ain't nobody would believe him. They'd think he was making it up.
[Hoisted by your own pervy petard, Grif.]
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[ This is an important question, Robbie feels, because Rich is heavily invested in showing off how out-of-this-world this world is, and Robbie doesn't get why. It exists. Great? If there's no more to the story, he's not all that interested.
He probably should be more interested. The tri-jutsu concept is different, to be sure, but Robbie keeps finding the flaws in this planet. ]
I think so, but now I just want to see what happens if a Carggite goes insane. Does the tri-jutsu still work, if all three are insane? If one of the three gets a brain injury, what happens then? Would your friend know that, or does he specialize in depravity?
[ A beat passes. ]
Also, now that I'm not thinking about triplets for a minutes, I have two questions. A: is the three starbursts really not the flag? Because I kind of figured it was. B: I'd back him up. One word, buddy: solicitation.
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Hey, I was just trying to find someone that could help us with our flat tire. How was I supposed to know they were hookers? Compared to the ladies of the night you see around New York, they weren't dressed all that revealing.
[More trailer trashy than anything and he figures it's not right to judge people for being poor.]
Someone wants to wear fishnets and a crop top, I'm not gonna assume anything or make any value judgments.
[Considering some of the women he's had in his life, prone to wearing bikinis or...whatever that weird, not-quite-bathing suit Gamora used to wear was, his lack of being judgmental over women's clothes has been an important survival skill (alongside just being a nice thing to do).]
And I'm trying to prove it mostly because this is what I do now. [He realizes that isn't a very good explanation.] I mean... I just--
[He's not sure how to articulate his state of always-distracting-himself.]
I used to always be on the move, you know? Tens of thousands of distress calls, just one Nova. Now I have to wait to actually get dispatched, and I'm not allowed to just fly around answering distress calls by myself. If I didn't let myself get caught up in curiosity or stupid, fun stuff I think I'd go bonkers.
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[ Robbie is genuinely giggling at the term. It's so patently ridiculous; it's perfect. He wished they've been filming that, because he wants to keep that moment forever. ]
Blue blazes, Rich, what would your mom think if she knew you were hanging around with them scarlet women? Oh gee whiz.
[ But he's laughing now, so hard that he has to wipe fresh tears away from the corners of his eyes when he starts to calm down. Rich is trying to be serious, and Robbie's interrupting. Get ahold of yourself; it's not that funny. He needed to let off a little stress, though, and the laughter really helped with that.
Robbie clears his throat, and his smile falls into something flatter and more stoic. After thinking about that for a minute, he shakes his head, just barely moving his chin back and forth while one corner of his mouth pulls back into a grimace. Then, it's back to neutral. What is there to say? Your life sounds like shit, Rich. That was never supposed to be your life. It sounds hopeless.
It probably was hopeless.
... it actually is hopeless, for Rich.
Where did the fun, stupid stuff go? It was just here, a moment ago. He was laughing, and he had the fun in his hands. Then, it all went to ash, even his spit tastes like sand. ]
You deserve it. The stupid, fun stuff. And the vacation.
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Drives me nuts. Not the fun stuff -- that's alright. But the vacation.
[He's okay with fun, he just hates not moving.]
[He doesn't like how quickly the laughter leaves Robbie's eyes, though. It's that easy now, it seems. For the laughter to come and go. It used to just come easily, with almost everything Robbie did, but now apparently it goes just as easily, too. Like a switch, flipping back and forth. Happy, then sad. Sad, then happy. Sad, then stoic, stoic then happy, happy then stoic, then sad again. He doesn't stay consistently in the happy groove for long periods like he used to.]
[Rich is starting to understand it now. It took him some time, but he needed more than that one fuzzy night of drinks and catching up -- and the sad didn't show its face as much then. Rich was home and Robbie was doing better and they'd had time to grieve who was gone and Rich wasn't among them yet. Now Robbie's happy has to wrestle with 'losing you hurt me' and 'I'm scared you won't stay alive.']
[Understanding it doesn't mean he knows the best way to deal with it, but he'll figure it out. And he figures maybe one of the best things he can do is is let Robbie see his contentment. Maybe there are things that make him twitchy, maybe there are ugly things from the war and everything else still caught in the cobwebs of his brain, but it's not all grim. At least, Rich doesn't see his life or the last few years that way. Never having time to rest isn't the torture it sounds like.]
I never knew that's what I wanted. That life. Not having vacations. [His voice is quiet and gentle and filled with something that's almost...longing. To go back to that life of no rest.] Don't get me wrong, doing it without the Corps, that's no picnic. But I used to care way too much about how everyone else saw me. I used to care about the wrong things.
When I'm doing that, it's just me and the stars, and all those people that need somebody. And I can just help them all day, every day.
[Is it surprising at all that he likes just helping people 24/7? That he takes joy in it? That he prefers living a life cruising alongside the stars instead of being crammed in a ship?]
And they all--they just see me.
[He can't think of a better way to explain it. Being seen. It isn't just that they celebrate him, treat him as someone important, someone to be honored. The sincerity they put into it makes it feel real. Sometimes it makes him feel like maybe he really deserves it, like that's him and they're just seeing something a lot of people back home never saw. They're looking into him and seeing something decent and noble and maybe it's really, actually there.]
[It's what he always wanted and what he only ever got from his friends and family, people looking at him and thinking 'look at what a good soul.']
[Normally, this isn't something he talks about openly, but there's a part of him that rebels against the idea of people looking at that life and thinking it's something bad he needs a break from. Vacations are suffering when you love your job.]
The Legion's like that, too, I guess, but there's so much waiting. And people look up to us, but there's press. Public relations. The team itself is okay about things, but with the public, it's little too...about image.
[He waves a hand dismissively at that. ]
Not my thing anymore.
[The UP's love of the Legion is about idols and adulation, and they clearly don't mind knocking heroes from their pedestals with the right provocation. It's not the simple gratitude and simple kindness he's grown used to from the peoples he's helped back home. He'd much rather share a terrible-tasting meal with a grateful alien species under another world's sky, or hear someone like Ronan call him brother, than get a fannish newslink tell-all that doesn't even get the details right.]
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He thought that leaving was going to be standing on his own two feet, but Robbie hadn't expected the loneliness. Even with Vance along for the ride, it had been too quiet. Too dull. Too much time to think about his last road trip. That's how he wound up reforming the New Warriors and nearly getting another team killed.
Now he's here, and yes, he's fumbling at coping with Rich. Robbie is already grieving inside for Rich heading back to his death.
And he's supposed to sit here and listen to Rich say he doesn't want a vacation.
It hurts, okay? It hurts to know someone that's lost everything still doesn't want to change anything. ]
What's it like? When you can just work, no outside interference?
[ Robbie really is curious about the idea. As much as he feels like helping people is the one thing he's good at, he's also comparatively terrible at it. He's never managed to help without trying to please someone else. Ever. He never will. ]
Some of us didn't get to fly off with the stars.
[ Some of them were stuck with the PR and the damaged image. Self-damaged image. It wasn't Rich's fault, and Robbie didn't mean to sideswipe a guilt trip like that.
It's just - part of him has always been a tiny bit jealous of the outer space thing. He's seen enough NASA photos to know there's a reason to be jealous of Rich's… not luck. It's not luck when it kills you in the end, but… the universe is beautiful.
He's much too fake mucho macho to admit that's the reason why he's been jealous, naturally. ]
I don't have to be bitter anymore. You have a helmet that lets you fly, and they hooked me up with a slick ring that means I never get towed around again. Oh, and I do a pretty good boring interview now. Guess you'll get a chance to see it if I don't do a good enough impression of paint drying. I'll take all your screen time, if you tell them it's because I'm more photogenic.
[ He tries to smile winningly at Rich, like pearly teeth will make Rich more willing to let Robbie torment himself with television reporters on his friend's behalf. ]
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[So he talks about the stars.]
I know how they say thank you in dozens of languages. [His grin gets bigger.] And also how to curse in dozens of languages. And what the sky looks like in just about every color the sky can be. And there's this one world -- I told Sam about it -- they speak in music. Just this little, tinkly crystal music that's like --
[He sighs.]
I can't carry a tune in a bucket, but I wish I could, just to be able to imitate how it sounds so I could tell people.
[He can't describe it. He's never been the descriptive, creative type. He certainly can't sing it.]
Earth is like the New Jersey of meta-people -- and wow, that really makes it sound terrible, but I mean population density. More heroes per square mile than any other world. Other places, you find these little squishy squid people. Or little tiny wrinkly pink people. Sentient crab-things.
[He holds up his hands.]
The Relaviss are this big. Palm of your hand. They look almost like flowers. Their tech is bio-organic -- they grow everything. Just vines and flowers everywhere.
Somebody's gotta be there for them. So in I zoom. And ain't nothing can stop me from at least trying.