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[He almost doesn't want to make the stupid video but he knows that, as much as he wants to, he can't just hide away until the next mission, ninja in, and start doing...whatever. Hero stuff. Whatever it is that heroes do.]

[God, he's done it this time, hasn't he? Gotten into yet more hero crap, and he doesn't even know these assholes. At least back home, he and the other Remedial kids are friends now. Sure, he's hoping to eventually use them in his whole quest for vengeance, but at this point, they'd probably help out with that willingly.]

[Now he's got to make nicey nice with a bunch of strangers, when it was already hard enough to do it the first time. And apparently he's not allowed to kill anybody if he joins up with their outfit. The only way to really face this threat to all their worlds is with this stupid team, and that means he's got to follow their stupid rules.]

[So it's a very cranky ninja that appears on screen. His face is cowled; the small bit of skin that's visible is a bright blue. Two pointy white horns jut out from the sides of his forehead, and his eyes glow with a menacing orange glow. Even though his face is cowled, the way his eyes are crinkled up make it clear he's scowling under there.]

[When he speaks, his voice is low and raspy. He sounds like the teenage boy he is, but definitely the kind of teenage boy that smokes six packs a day. Also the Joisey accent is pretty unmistakable.]

'Sup, losers. My name's Kyou Tanaka. I've been told there's some kind of cosmic whatever we've gotta stab repeatedly in the face.

Which is a good thing because apparently the morons in charge of this outfit won't let us stab anything else in the face.

So you're going to not be seeing me hanging around a lot. I say "not" on account of, y'know, ninja. But on the off chance you ever do see me, like when I move in for the ki - uh, punching, for the punching - don't shoot me or blow me up with butt lasers or anything. I can heal from it, but seeing as most of you can't heal when I inevitably throw a shuriken in your eye on sheer reflex, you should probably save us both the trouble.

[He pauses. Shit, what else is he supposed to say?]

I guess I'm supposed to tell you my "superhero" name. [Quotey fingers. He only has four fingers on each hand.] It's Murderizer McKillinstuff.

[Another pause.]

Just because I'm following your stupid no-killing rules doesn't mean I have to like it.

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