Lavernius Tucker (
lovernotafighter) wrote in
thelegion2017-09-21 09:53 pm
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World's Okayest Dad | Video
[Tucker looked...well, it was hard to tell because his helmet's on, but there was something annoyed in his movements. Behind him was a room that seemed mostly barren and militaristic aside from the tossed about mess, a room that might seem familiar to his Chorus friends really, and the camera shook a little as he plucked something off a wall. It was turned over in his hand before he pointed it at the camera. A photograph, one with five human kids holding basketballs, and one that's...a little different.]
Since someone brought it up and now we're talking about it, yeah, I've got a kid. His name is Junior and he's amazing and I'm super freakin' proud of him. He can kick anyone's ass in basketball, is a freaking diplomat and on a scholarship, he knows at least ten different words for "dick", and he hasn't bitten a person in at least three months. He got a ribbon at school for that one.
[He pulled the picture back and put it on the wall again; there was one in his wallet, too. He was, in some few and far between ways, like every other dad out there, just with better jokes.]
He's the best goddamn thing about being a Chosen One. [There was a momentary pause, because--]...Okay, so maybe he's tied with the sword.
Don't ask specifics. Just know that childbirth sucks, I don't want to talk about that, but I'll tell you how damn amazing my son is if you want to listen. And I know I'm not the only one with weird families, so come on and spill it.
Since someone brought it up and now we're talking about it, yeah, I've got a kid. His name is Junior and he's amazing and I'm super freakin' proud of him. He can kick anyone's ass in basketball, is a freaking diplomat and on a scholarship, he knows at least ten different words for "dick", and he hasn't bitten a person in at least three months. He got a ribbon at school for that one.
[He pulled the picture back and put it on the wall again; there was one in his wallet, too. He was, in some few and far between ways, like every other dad out there, just with better jokes.]
He's the best goddamn thing about being a Chosen One. [There was a momentary pause, because--]...Okay, so maybe he's tied with the sword.
Don't ask specifics. Just know that childbirth sucks, I don't want to talk about that, but I'll tell you how damn amazing my son is if you want to listen. And I know I'm not the only one with weird families, so come on and spill it.
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[Redemption quests? Psssh, what's that?]
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I have failed to meet that standard for quite some time. I intend to correct that.
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[And sometimes, Tucker hears only what he wants to hear.]
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