[Video, post-plots]

[thedreamisdead]

Morning, culture lovers.

[Someone's in a chipper mood. Might have something to do with the fact that she's in the sim room, sitting alongside an oversized motorcycle that is in no way compensating for anything.]

So, I've been talking things over with the techs and Brainiac 5, and I've decided to simply open up Anywhere Machine access to my timeline for all Legion members. I just ask that you keep it to training purposes. If you try to nose into my private life, well. I don't really have one. You'll get bored. Sorry.

[She makes an adjustment and holo displays pop up around her. Dates, times, locations, what looks like an options list. Sharp-eyed viewers will see that the dates seem to be color coded.]

Using some algorithms that Brainiac 5 set up for me to account for Legion training standards, along with my own estimations, I've sectioned off portions of my life that I feel would be... instructive. Either to hone investigative skills, practice medicine, brush up on your rescue skills, enhance your understanding of stealth, or simply enhance your understanding of conflict. I've also encoded a number of these events with content warnings. I've handled nearly every form of crime you care to mention and consoled a number of victims. Some of you just aren't prepared for that, so please keep in mind your own limitations and read through the warnings before you engage.

[More adjustments are made. Holograms of her, her pistol, and the motorcycle pop up.]

If you should attempt a sim scenario, you'll get three options. One is to simply follow in my steps and see how things were handled. You'll have the option to pause and get context for anything you have questions for, rewind, or use any filters you'd like. Another is to go through it as a Judge, temporarily refusing to acknowledge your powers in favor of the full experience. [For some people, to put their money where their mouths are and show her a better way to handle things with her limitations.] If you decide to go this route, I would strongly suggest reading Dredd's Comportment first. The things you learn there might make things much easier for you. You'll be given the tools of a Judge, such as the lie detector, the Lawmaster motorcycle, the Lawgiver Mk II, and the helmet, especially valuable for its vision modes. When you arrest someone, you will be expected to sentence them on the spot, so I've compiled a common list of offenses and their usual sentences. At your discretion, of course, but if you're going that far you might as well get into the spirit of the thing.

[She filters through a few, laying them over the camera to display herself in each mode. Ultrasound. Infrared. Night vision. Killshot percentages. Disabling shot suggestions.]

Finally, you get the option to simply go in as yourself. Since you're still taking 'my' place, you won't be immediately targeted for illegal vigilante activities, and your powers will be treated as something usual. Brainiac 5 wished me to stress that he created the sim rooms and they're able to function with almost any powerset, including the psychic ones.

We talked about incentives and came to an agreement that passing out stickers for participation would likely be the most acceptable way to go about things.

[She grins again and holds up a roll of stickers covered in gold stars.]

Never say I don't keep you in mind.

In closing, I'll be happy to discuss any questions or concerns you might have about this. I haven't made the decision lightly, but I do believe that it could offer some... 'real world' incentives that other scenarios might not. Everything you will see is as raw and true as it can be, and everyone you will see was, or is, a real person, so keep those things in mind. This isn't one of the programmed sims where we rescue crash test dummies.

[She cuts out, but the links to The Comportment of a Judge, by J. Dredd and the list of dates remain up. Skimming through them, some scenarios are only minutes long, others hours or days. There's very few 'off' times, with only about four days coming up if someone skims back five years. In the past two years, a number of 'Council Meetings' take up chunks of her days during various weeks, but every other time slice is split into investigation, travel, interrogation, combat, escort, and chase sections. Three stretches of time are unusual. One is marked 'Chaos Day and Recovery', with the lead up to it being nearly entirely 'investigation' and the days surrounding it marked entirely as 'combat' or 'rescue'. Another is marked 'Block Judge Duty' and seems to be split into investigation, combat, and 'court duties'. The final one is marked 'Tour of Duty' and lasts for months on end, with 'training' making up the vast majority of her time.

Only fifteen minutes is relegated for sleep every day. An hour or two for meals. That remains standard over the past eight or nine years, at which point it suddenly switches to a more structured thing. Life at the Academy of Law. Much of the time is listed as 'training' for various things, except full nights of sleep, and it reaches back eleven years until she's five years old. She's stopped accounting for her time at that point.]

Comments

video;

[marryonette]

Whoa, geeze... That's a lot to take in. I'm feeling a little dizzy, actually.

But I'm sure this would be really helpful! -Not for her, given so much of this was 'programmed' into her, but... Best not to say too much about that.- It's really awesome of you to provide this opportunity!

[thedreamisdead]

It is a lot, but we don't have the luxury of time. We never know when the next big crisis will come up.

I may have some differences of opinion with our teammates, but that's no reason to avoid providing everything I possibly can if it helps keep someone alive.

[marryonette]

Kinda... makes it really sink in how dangerous this all is...

Welp! That just means I gotta work hard to make sure I can help keep someone alive, too! Er, that is, I mean... by being good at my job. Heh.

[thedreamisdead]

Better you learn in a 'safe' environment. You're lucky to have a resource like this, though. When I trained, we used live ammunition.

[A beginner, huh?]

Keep in mind that the tactics used there are a little different from your typical Legion missions. You'll have to pick and choose on your best judgement.

video; combo

[muroieda]

[That is.

A lot of information to take in.

And he's only going to retain enough of it to be rounded up to single whole percent.]

Holy dooley.

[muroieda]

If I knew bein' a hero was gonna be so bloody complicated I would'a stayed in jail.

[Right, because being an internationally (maybe even intergalactically?) wanted criminal was easy.]

done

[muroieda]

Still...

I want those stickers.

[Priorities. He's being totally serious.]

And I guess learnin' how ta save people would come in handy.

[thedreamisdead]

Oh, this is all optional. But you only get the stickers if you participate.

[She holds up the roll. It's designed with Mega-City One aesthetics in mind, to trigger the "I want it" mentality. Shiny gold stars, speckled in glitter, with a holofoil "YOU'RE #1!" stamped in the middle of each. There's a few other rolls with different shapes and phrases, but they're all pretty similar.

Then there's the "you tried" stickers. She thinks she'll need a lot of those.]

This should be seen as supplementary to your normal Legion training, not a replacement.

[If you're not attending those classes, you might have some trouble.]

[muroieda]

[Please, the extra incentive really isn't needed. They don't really need to be shiny and gold - though it's an added bonus - but he'd be just as keen on them if they were cute things like cartoon animals, rainbows, and generally positive shlock.

It's the little things.]

Uh. Normal...Legion training. Roight.

[Spoken with hesitation as if he had no idea that was a thing that existed, because as far as his memory is concerned, they don't. He found out they existed, looked into them, decided they weren't needed, and promptly forgot about them.]

Reckon they're some kinda prerequisite then, yeah?

[Don't break his heart. Don't make him go to formal classes.]

[tenzero]

So... a sim room? Simalcrum? [Nezha may not have a mouth, but from the way that the frame is nearly vibrating with excitement it's not hard to understand that he'd be grinning wide if he could.]

Okay, where do we sign up? Can we sign up multiple times?

Er, do the sims interact strangely with somatics? [This doesn't need to be a repeat of that incident with Baro]

[thedreamisdead]

[Given how often cits wear masks or helmets or the like, reading body language is pretty much a requirement. The corner of her mouth quirks. That's almost infectious.]

Simulation.

[Though you could say it's all simulacrums.]

You'll find the sim rooms down... Well, it's an entire planet, I suppose. Best to ask your omnicomm for a map. Once there, you can request just about any program, or schedule one. I'll be notified if you're accessing one of mine.

[She pauses for a moment.]

I don't know. It depends on what you mean by 'somatics'.

[tenzero]

An entire planet? [That's fantastic and if he was excited before he's entirely elated now.] And there's no limit to how long you can be there? That might be the coolest thing that I've ever heard of.

[He goes quiet for a moment though, trying to piece together a proper explanation.] Somatics like...I mean these particular simulations are based off of old memories, right? I uh, I mean I've seen it where sometimes the somatics can...

Okay so there's no way to go through this without being really confusing, but if these are based off of memory, I've had the problem where my somatics do a strange voidy thing and start pulling out more information from memories than they should.

It's only happened once though! I didn't know it could even do that! So I don't think it should be a problem, but uh, I don't want to accidentally break anything or tick anybody off.

[thedreamisdead]

Mm? Sorry, no, I was just thinking about how stupid it was to give foot directions on Legion World. The sim rooms can make planets, but they're still within Legion World itself. [Sorry, guy.]

[And his explanation gets a shake of the head.]

No. The sim rooms are hard light, guided by computer program. You're not accessing my memories. I don't think they can. Even if it could, my memory isn't perfect.

The sim rooms are, apparently, connected to an Anywhere Machine. Someone should have mentioned it to you, but the Anywhere Machines allow you to view anything, anywhere, anywhen. Past or present, or even through alternate dimensions if you have the coordinates.

The only limit seems to be that you can't see the future. And you can't see your teammate's pasts, but that's more of a lock that Brainiac 5 has put in to avoid unwanted invasions of privacy. To my knowledge, I'm the only Legionnaire who's opened themselves up this much.

But, then, I have nothing to hide. [Unlike some of their teammates.] I just ask that people avoid my pre-Academy of Law days and any points where I'm in the shower.

In any case, it sounds like your somatics should be safe.

video;

[deafleppard]

I'm worried about you.

video;

[thedreamisdead]

Well, at least my charming personality has won a few fans over.

What's wrong with me this time?

video;

[deafleppard]

Just so you know, Babbage doesn't count. Pretty sure they like everyone and everything.

At the same time. And every day.

Re: video;

[thedreamisdead]

Aren't most robots friendly? Except the combat ones, that is.

Sorry, you lost me there.

video;

[fuckaccuracy]

There an audio equivalent for "too long; didn't read?"

I really feel like there should be.

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[thedreamisdead]

I wonder if people who announce that ever feel embarrassed over advertising that they have the attention span of a gnat on zziz?

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[fuckaccuracy]

Yeah, see, I can't remember the last time I felt embarrassed over anything.

video;

[thedreamisdead]

No wonder you have time to do things.

[walkingballpit]

As much as I've always loved a good gold star, this is weird. I'm not stepping into anyone's life like that. It's - it's your life. Aren't you more attached to it than to offer it up to an Anywhere Machine for everything else to go over again and again? It's messed up.

[thedreamisdead]

No.

[Well, it could be a worse opener. That he's not participating isn't a shocker. She got the picture he couldn't stand her.]

I don't have a life. I take an hour or so of personal time once every few weeks, but it's not like I get to hang out with friends on their mopad, go shopping, or rewatch Hardy Dix's performance in the '24 World Sex Championships. I don't have a family or friends who aren't Judges. Every minute of my day is spent doing my job. The worst someone can do is spy on me in the shower, and I don't get any fun in there, either.

If someone can go through my experiences and learn how to enter rooms with unknown occupants, handle hostile crowds in enclosed spaces, patch up a gunshot, or deliver a baby, if anyone can go through and learn anything to save their own life or someone else's, then I've got no problem with being an example.

[walkingballpit]

[ It could be worse, but he felt bad for her. He thought he knew what it was like, to be the dedicated to an unhealthy life for what Robbie considered to be the best purpose - the only purpose worth having, really. Doing What's Right.

Only America's never said what she's done to deserve having to do it to the point of "an hour or so of personal time every couple of weeks." Even Robbie gets more of a life than that, lately.

So it's just... sad in a dull, aching sort of way that makes him want to go hug every last person who has hung out with him in the last few years. And then ask them how the hell you get someone to transition from existing to living. He wants to say that she deserves more than that, but it's not like he listened to that. ]

The World Sex Championships? Titillating.

[ Old habits die hard. ]

So fun exists in your universe? Grossly personal activities turned into world championships don't count. Mopeds and shopping and coffee shops and other people - those are around, and you don't bother?

[thedreamisdead]

[She snorts.]

Hey, people like to watch it. And it's highly choreographed. Honestly, from what I've seen of the fandom here, no one's got the imagination to make it far in anything except the singles.

[Citizen Dix retired ages ago, however. From what she remembers, chronic impotence. Shame. She's not sure how Mega-City One will do in the Olympics without his skilled touch.]

A Judge can't bother. Our entire life is devoted to our job. Anything else is a distraction. [She shrugs at the screen.] You once mocked me for saying that I was the Law. But there's nothing else for me.

[She glances off-screen, flipping through the pages of that book. Dredd's Comportment, she'd called it. She holds it up to the camera for him to read, tapping one specific line.

"A Judge must totally devote himself to justice and the rule of the Law. A Judge has no life of his own. He does not indulge in social contact. He has no income and no personal property beyond that required to carry out his normal duty."]

I am the Law, Mr. Baldwin. And I'll never have anything else until the day I hit Resyk or take the Long Walk into the Cursed Earth.

[Even the reforms she hopes to bring can't change everything in her lifetime.]