thelegion | Mom's home, hide the beer [video]

I'd also like to say that I'm very proud of how you all handled that situation. You were fast, thorough, and put saving lives first, which is exactly how the Legion operates. [She cracks a smile.] I can't say I've ever been rescued to musical accompaniment before, but that was also a very nice touch.

[She sobers.]

That being said, I've been informed about some of the conversation that took place during the planning phase, and I'd like to amend Nova Prime's reminder: if you kill someone when you don't have to, you will not be watching the apocalypse from the sidelines as a civilian. You will be watching it from a jail cell, because murder is, in fact, a sprocking crime here. If it is not a case where there was literally no other way to stop the sentient and it was vital to the preservation of your own life or the lives of other sentients, then don't sprocking go for the sprocking killshot. I like all of you, I appreciate what you've done by joining the Legion, don't make me plant your ass on Takron-Galtos. Because I will, and I will do it so fast that you'll be tasting yesterday's breakfast.

[She takes a deep breath and lets it out before changing the subject.]

The smaller, planned mission was also a success. We got our hands on the Spear of Destiny, it's currently being stored in a box labeled "open in case of Spectre" because I'm sure that there's more than one person who'd be tempted to crack anything labeled "do not open." Seriously though, even when we take out of secure lockup for response against the Spectre, try to minimize contact with it as much as possible. We're going to have to make sure our response plan to the Spectre utilizes it as safely as it can be used.

We also got a bonus gift from the sentient known as the Wizard; it's a book that should be able to help us with a number of things: tools to combat Chronoblivion and ways to block magical spying, for two. Magic isn't personally my bag -- my background is in genetic engineering, not archaeology -- but if anyone wants to take swing at it, let me know.

I especially want to prioritize using it to see if we can identify the...whatever-it-was that claimed it was using the suicide bomber in the studio as a "meat-suit."

[Kid Q gets her Extra Serious Business face on.]

Now it's time to talk next steps. I'm going to start off by saying that the next part of the briefing will be extra encrypted, with something Brainy worked up that will make it secure from even Legion staff. Hit the button for a security scan to view the second part of the briefing when you're somewhere free from prying eyes.

Edited 2017-02-25 05:52 (UTC)

[A button pops up that'll force them to use the highest security scan the omnicoms have to continue, whatever each Legionnaire agreed to set when they started using their omnicoms, whether it's fingerprint scan or ridiculous password or retinal scan. It's extra inconvenient, which is why she doesn't use this setting for briefings that don't need it.]

The reason this is so encrypted is because the corrupt Council-members that have been selling us out are going down, so we're going to have to discuss undertaking technically-criminal actions. We're not talking a full mutiny -- not unless the entire UP government is colluding with Chronoblivion, the Legion of Supervillains, and/or criminal parties unknown, in which case, we'll have to instigate a nonviolent coup. Again.

[She rolls her eyes and says this like it's a regular thing. Because it is. They've overthrown the government or exposed corrupt factions of it enough time that it's a habit.]

But right now we're treating this as a standard small-scale infiltration-slash-collusion incident, and if it needs to be more we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Babbage compiled voting records and other communications we can use to try tracing the Council-members behind all this.

[She provides access to a highly secure, encrypted file exchange, with a file dump that they can comb through to find out who all was involved.]

Anyone that feels they have valuable tactical insights to offer are welcome to contribute. We need to cross-reference and isolate the Council-members that were involved in multiple decisions that adversely affected the team, and there are a lot of documents to work through.

Payback has offered to re-form the Legion's Espionage Squad. Once we have leads, we'll execute espionage operations to gain proof we can use to have the guilty parties taken into custody. For that, we'll need hackers that are willing to break UP security laws -- and more importantly, can do it without getting caught. We'll also need squad members with infiltration skills, and probably some specialized abilities, as well as some muscle. All espionage operations will be informed by whatever leads we find.

Think back to what we did back when we took back that artifact for the Dryads from the casino. Only this time we're going against far nastier customers, and we're playing for keeps. Individual orders will be forthcoming as we narrow down what to look for.

Obviously, the fact we're taking a swing at UPgov is considered confidential. Alpha-level. That is our highest level of confidentiality. Breaking it means instant dismissal from the team. Because what we're doing is technically treason.

Alright, people, it's time to get to work. This nass has gone on long enough.

Edited 2017-02-25 05:58 (UTC)

I've always wanted to see a politician's face when I got to waggle a datapad under their noses and tell them that the jig is up.

It's just one of those Legion things. At some point or another, you get to overthrow something. I joined the team too late for the first few times it happened, and you joined too late for the most recent time, but now's your chance for the full Legion experience.

The first time, when Cosmic Boy's plan against Madame Chu played out perfectly and got her confessing to the entire UP, is still legendary, but that's no surprise when it involved Brainy faking his death live on the links.

Edited 2017-02-25 06:13 (UTC)

[It's probably a good thing no one can hear her eyes rolling.]

Wasn't one of the Dark Judges. Not enough rotting flesh and hissing about "You cannot kill what doesss not liiiiive". Or, my personal favorite, "The crime issss life, the sssentence isss death!"

[Then again, if it was a Dark Judge, they'd all be dead now. So there's that.]

Speaking of that last mission, though, I couldn't help but notice the diversity in loadout between members. Rifles, pistols, knives, flaming swords, giant hammers... Maybe we should look at something more standardized. Especially for less-than-lethal alternatives.

[There's a beat.]

Also, I need more high explosive rounds.

[Because grenades that you fire out of a hand cannon is what has to be discussed right after talking about non-lethal weaponry.]

I wasn't even born yet when that happened. The greatest years of the Legion passed me by.

[He sounds so mopey for a moment.]

Nnnot that these are bad years! Just, you know. They were...

...I'm gonna go back to practicing my datapad flourishing.

Espionage, secrecy, hacking, stealth... [It's sighed out with clear affection in her voice.] Hermosa if you wanted to write me a love letter all you needed to do was ask.

[What's that? Azucar/Quantum Queen fanfic starting to flood the Titanet immediately after this comment?

It's a mysterious coincidence.]

Edited 2017-02-25 06:34 (UTC)

Specialized in infiltration. Might qualify as muscle as well. More disposable than other heroes.

Seems a fitting choice.

Edited 2017-02-25 06:36 (UTC)

I sure hope you know what you're doing.

Special ops.

Meatsuit? What whatever-it-was?

[Dipper raises an eyebrow.]

What are you playing at, Kid Q?

Edited 2017-02-25 06:44 (UTC)

How long until Reinhardt is able to have visitors?

[it's not like she cares or anything.]

What's the old Earth saying? It's "not our first time at the studio"?

[What she's looking for is "rodeo." (You can't really blame her, she's from a planet that never had cows.)]

We've done this before. Multiple times. And we'll do it again. And back then, Invisible Kid was our only Legionnaire with experience in espionage work. I'm sure with the expertise of the people we have now that we'll do fine.

Okay, first of all, duly noted.

Second of all (and most importantly) no one on the team is disposable. No one.

If you get chosen for the Espionage Squad it'll be because of your skillset and because you volunteered, not because you're somehow less valuable than anyone else.

Edited 2017-02-25 06:59 (UTC)

... I'd like to study the book.

[ a beat. ]

I'm passingly familiar with magic, although most of my experience is with life energy. I'm a professional scholar though, I know how to research and find what we're looking for.

If someone more familiar with magic would rather have the book, that's fine too. I'd just like to help.

Edited 2017-02-25 06:56 (UTC)

From what Parker's told me, you guys might want to pack some firefighting gear.

And a potato.

The question of what specific weapons are necessary is a difficult one to answer when everyone's skills are so varied

By your standards, everyone would need to learn to use a firearm. By mine, no one would need to be armed at all. [Yes, he just survived an ambush, but to be fair, there was a reason they worked him over extra good (albeit not as badly as Brainy), so that he was weakened even when freed.] Perhaps it is best to let each Legionnaire play to their strengths.

Edited 2017-02-25 07:09 (UTC)

I never ask permission to write love letters. You're sharp, but I've had to tell someone that we were going out on a date so that he'd stop answering my questions with questions.

If Payback hasn't already gotten in touch with you, I'm sure she will shortly.

It's rodeo.

[He's got you. He doesn't believe you, but he's got you.]

You need a longer resume?

I'm fine unarmed or just a daystick. I was top of my class in Applied Violence.

[She was top of her class in a lot of things. She even acted as a student teacher for a few of the younger Cadets.]

No disrespect, but your combat effectiveness ends at the end of your fists. Or however far you're throwing something. My combat effectiveness has a range of three miles. Or, if we're talking purely stun shots, a few meters.

It's a lot easier to teach someone to aim with a gun than it is to teach them the muscle memory required for good hand-to-hand combat. And if we can shut our opponents down before we have to use our close quarters training, so much the better.

If I had more details on it, I'd have been more specific than 'whatever-it-was'.

[She answers wryly, but sobers to give him more detail.]

One of the sentients on the Legion of Supervillains -- we're still trying to identify him -- seems to have been possessed. He referred to himself as being a "meat-suit" and suddenly seemed surprised to find himself holding a bomb seconds away from detonation. We've yet to identify the possessing entity as well.

Why?

Strengths lie in special and covert ops.
Give me a team, and I'll lead.

[ nevermind he already has a team in mind, but there's always spots that need filling. ]

[Dipper's face falls and goes the kind of pale grey that only happens when your body goes full fight-or-flight. It doesn't matter that Dipper's in another universe, it doesn't matter that he's supposed to be gone...]

What else did he say?! You have to tell me exactly what he said, like the specific wording!

Fuck yeah, count me in. Those guys are assholes.

Mom's home, hide the beer [video]

Basic Briefing [video]

Super Encrypted Part 2 [video]

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