[video] Dip-dop Says Hello

[captainbuzzkill]

[There is a noodle-child on the comms, one that looks maybe only just old enough to be a Legionnaire. His hat is missing because he lost it on the planet and his slightly poofy hair is sticking up, so that a birth mark in the shape of the Big Dipper is visible on his forehead. He's currently hyperventilating. His eyes are wide and he's breathing like every new breath makes it even harder to take the next breath.]

Oh man. Oh man. Oh man.

[Will someone help this wayward child? This poor, clearly terrified--]

This is the best thing ever!

[Okay, so maybe he's not hyperventilating because he's scared. Maybe he's just so excited he can barely breathe right. In fact, he's so excited he basically went on the network pretty much as soon as the omnicom was put in his hands. The situation got explained to him -- and he lied his butt off about his age because they mentioned the age limit before they asked what his was -- and now he's clearly still in his Medbay bed, not even released from the Medbay yet, hyperventilating on the comms in excitement over his situation.]

Not the whole being dimensionally displaced part -- even if time supposedly isn't passing back home -- or the, y'know, mortal peril part, but we're in space! Did you all see that? You can just look outside the window! And it's space!

And my doctor had four arms! And was purple!

[Yes, he's excited. Supposedly, he even has superpowers now.]

And we all have superpowers! And -- what am I saying, all you people know this, right? They said other people have been here longer. Do you all have cool powers? Are any of you aliens? Mutants? Or, like, I dunno, space wizards with laser swords or something? That seems like a thing that could happen.

[His other hand comes in frame and he makes a gimme gimme gesture.]

Gimme the lay of the land. What am I looking at here?

[A pause and then he finally remembers maybe he should give his name. He says it like it's an afterthought.]

Oh yeah, I'm Dipper Pines.

Comments

[captainbuzzkill]

Hit me with the layman's explanation.

I don't know quantum physics but I'm smart enough to pick up on some basic concepts. I've dealt with, like, realities crossing over. Interdimensional portals. Stuff like that.

This isn't even my first time on an alien spaceship.

[nerdninja]

Okay, so - the tech to get us home probably exists here already, in the threshold gates. We can't really test that without clearing up two complications first. One's getting the navigational data to send everyone to the right place instead of just another alternate dimension.

Second is quantum tethers. So, by coming here, we seem to have gotten tied to this universe, strongly enough to override the "pull" our own dimensions ought to have on us. Figuring out how to unstick that is going to have to happen to get us out of here.

[captainbuzzkill]

If it's 'quantum' we're talking particle physics. So we're tied to this universe on the atomic level.

[He winces slightly.]

Which means trying to untangle us is dangerous, isn't it. Do it the wrong way and people could be ripped apart into a cloud of elementary particles.

[nerdninja]

Yeah. It's not the kind of thing you can just do a few quick tests on something expendable and call it good.

[captainbuzzkill]

Any theories on what did it? It must be someone or something that's powerful.

[nerdninja]

There are some forces in the records here that are theoretically capable of that much power, but nothing in particular - yet - that points to any particular one of them.

[captainbuzzkill]

So it's a mystery.

[Yes, that is excitement in his voice.]

[nerdninja]

Yeah, if you want to put it that way.

[captainbuzzkill]

Yes. Yes, I do. I do want to put it that way.

[He always wants to put it that way.]

I'm good at mysteries. That's why I chose the superhero name I chose:

Captain Mystery.

[It's a cool name. Because he's a cool guy.]

[nerdninja]

[ God. Is this kid a Holmes fanboy or something? ]

That's...pretty evocative.

[captainbuzzkill]

[The Sibling Brothers, Donnie. He's a fan of the Sibling Brothers Mysteries. And also countless conspiracies.]

Yes it is.

Captain Myssstery.

[nerdninja]

Just as long as we're clear that nobody's got time to roll the s if they're yelling for you in the middle of a fight.

Actually, in the middle of a fight, you're probably just gonna be Cap.

[captainbuzzkill]

[Dipper ponders this. "Cap" still also sounds cool. It sounds like what some heroes would call some badass soldier superhero guy as a nickname.]

...I'll allow it.

[nerdninja]

Hey, "Cap" is better than acceptable, that makes you sound like Captain America, who is awesome.

[captainbuzzkill]

I have absolutely no clue who that is.

[nerdninja]

He's strong and brave, here to save the American Way.

[captainbuzzkill]

Is he a character in comic books? Because he sounds like Sergeant Exceptionalism from Amazement Comics.

[nerdninja]

Where I come from: yes.

According to one guy I met here: he's not just a character everywhere.

[captainbuzzkill]

Wait wait, so are there people here who are fiction to other people that are here?

[Now, that is cool.]

[nerdninja]

Well, if you consider an infinite number of possible combinations of the elements that define any reality, then I guess it's technically inevitable, but in this small of a statistical sampling, I'm still pretty impressed that we actually see it happen within this group.

[ Because come on, there aren't even two dozen people here and yet he met an Avenger. What were the odds? ]

[captainbuzzkill]

Yeah, there are infinite realities, right? An infinite number of combinations. That means the chances of someone here being from a reality where someone else is fiction are infinitely small.

[nerdninja]

Exactly.

[ oh god, someone gets it without asking for smaller words. HE LIKES YOU ALREADY, DIPPER. ]