Video

[goddamngrenades]

[ The feed flicks on to show York, smiling in the mess with a mug of coffee in hand and Delta hovering over his left shoulder in all his six inch green glory. ]

Good Morning, beautiful people- it's another serene day on Legion World and I'm here to offer a little Legion wide challenge, bet, wager, whatever you wanna call it, I'm offering one.

My name is Locksmith and anyone that can encrypt a file, secure a room, or seal up a safe that I can't crack? Gets me as an errand boy for a full twenty four hours. And, you know. Bragging rights. Get to rub it in my face that Delta and I couldn't hack or pick whatever lock you've got set up.

[ He pauses to take a sip, setting the mug down for a moment of seriousness, hands lacing in front of him on the table, shoulders lifting and dropping in a brief shrug. ]

Now, some ground rules- it's gotta be a lock. No setting a two ton weight in front of a door and watching me sprain something trying to push it out of the way. I get a time limit I set when I see whatever you've got locked or encrypted, I'll tell you and I'll stick to it, anywhere from half an hour to three depending on whatever you've whipped up. Lastly: If I end up your errand boy no humiliating costumes. Been there, done that, I am not cute in a french maid outfit, ok? Ok.

[ Here Delta pipes up, offering helpfully: ] Amusing hats and signs of shame are, however, exempt from the 'humiliating costume' clause.

[ York turns his head to squint at Delta. ] Seriously?

Further incentive for participation, and for us not to fail. I am attempting to assist in your motivation.

Well, thanks for that.

So if you feel up to the challenge? Drop a line here or find me in the mess, I'll be the guy talking to a green hologram, drinking coffee.

Comments

Video

[goddamngrenades]

Hey, I can keep up. You wanna ride in my implant- [ a beat. ] Okay that sounded worse than it did in my head.

[ Almost dirty, even. Whoops. ]

I can verify that York has an incredibly adept mind.

Thanks for the vote of confidence D.

Video

[steelandtemper]

I doubt I'd fit.

[100% flawless deadpan.

She learned by watching the Master Chief.]

Video

[goddamngrenades]

I'm not packing the usual rig, I think there's space for you.

[ Heart eyes? Heart eyes. Meanwhile Delta sighs from where he hovers. ]

[unrecovered]

[Wash has popcorn. He went all the way to the mess hall to get popcorn with shitty vegan butter, just for the look he wants to give on this video.]

Okay, as entertaining as this has been, and as desperate as I know you are, you need to stop.

[What the fuck, York.]

[goddamngrenades]

Wash, shut up, I'm having a moment of appreciation here.

[ Seriously, dick move bro. ]

She is a fine lady with an incredible mind. Did you see what she sent me? Seriously.

[unrecovered]

Pretty sure she's not available.

Also, she's an AI.

[The guy who had a complete mental break is currently your reality check. Something is stunningly wrong with this situation.]

Though you're giving the fans that ship you and Delta a good reason reason to do it.

[goddamngrenades]

Just means she's a digital person rather than physical. And we can be friends, right? Stop trying to rain on my parade, seriously. Hurricane Wash incoming.

[ He rolls his eyes and slumps back, sipping his coffee. ]

Seriously. This is next level stuff.

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[steelandtemper]

I've already got a ride, Agent York. I think you've met him. Sierra-117.

[Note to self: tell Chief how much you appreciate him. Deal with resulting confusion.]

[unrecovered]

[S-117- wait. Wait]

You're partnered with Chief?

[steelandtemper]

[Went to Spartans R Us and picked him out herself.]

Someone has to keep him alive.

[unrecovered]

["Somebody decided I was worth dying for once, Wash. I never want someone to make her choice again."]

[It could be-]

[No. Jumping to conclusions isn't going to help anyone, and that's one hell of a leap right now. Wash isn't about to ask.]

Well, thanks. He's been spending a lot of time here keeping the rest of us alive - I guess I have you to thank for that.

[steelandtemper]

He's pretty good even without me, but I definitely taught him a few tricks.

[All of which are completely useless when she's not in the armor but eh, details.]

[unrecovered]

Is "nearly bulldozing people in the hall" one of them? Because it turns out he's really good at that.

[Who has two thumbs and nearly got wrecked in Chief's race to get to Cortana? This guy.]

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[goddamngrenades]

...I. Um.


Hot damn. Could you maybe not tell him I wanna marry you cuz that could get awkward real fast.

[unrecovered]

[Wash doesn't say a damn thing; he just eats popcorn. Through his helmet.]

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[steelandtemper]

Well, okay, but only because I like Delta.

[Relax, all he'd do is loom.]

Re: Video

[goddamngrenades]

He is a fan of yours as well. [ Enough that his eye goes a little green and his mannerisms shift ever so slightly. Just a touch of D in them. ] Seriously, he might be the head of the we heart cortana club. I'm a close second.

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[steelandtemper]

[Actually, that's the Chief.]

You're lucky my ego is already enormous, or this might be going to my head.

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[goddamngrenades]

The work you do you kinda deserve to have that ego. Just say'n. I'm gonna be picking at this for at least a week.

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[prettycoolguy]

Noted.

[ Someone's finally noticed these shenanigans. His tone does nothing to convey that this is actually pretty funny to him. ]

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[steelandtemper]

Oops.

[Totally unrepentant.]

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[goddamngrenades]

Why you gotta do me like that? I thought we were cool.

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[steelandtemper]

He found this all by himself. Spartans are highly qualified comms operators, even without AI assistance.

[She might care more if the Chief were actually upset, but she can feel his amusement.]

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[goddamngrenades]

Hail to the chief. [ Smile and salute, here. ] You got a hell of a partner.

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[prettycoolguy]

I do.

[ It's always nice to see someone appreciates her as much as the Chief does. He's definitely started to rankle against the whole "AI's are tools and should be treated as such" bit lately.

And, after seeing her deteriorate and die, it's good to see Cortana enjoying herself. ]

Glad to see she's making friends.

[ There's no bite in any of it, no sarcasm. This bond isn't one that a bit of banter can threaten. The Chief's just teasing, in his poorly-emoted, deadpan way. ]