legionnpcs (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
legionnpcs) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
thelegion2017-04-18 04:45 am
legionnpcs) wrote in thelegion2017-04-18 04:45 am
Legion Watch | 004 [video]
[The Legion World staff maintains a feed of all Legion-related media so Legionnaires can be kept abreast of any reporting that's done on them. A segment has aired on Neutrino News about the Legionnaires and their capture of War and the corrupt Council-members.]
[Two women appear on the screen, sitting at a desk, their appearances altered by glam filters so that one is all pink hair and skin and sparkles, and the other is all in blues. They look pretty flashy and tacky but this is the future. Reporters don't exist anymore; they're "personalities" now. More serious news outlets have already reported on the Council-members; this is one of the fluffier retrospective programs that have aired.]
Shellee: I'm Shellee Star! [That would be the pink one.]
Tammee: And I'm Tammee Tim! [That would be the blue one.]
Together: And this is Legion Watch! [They say it in unison in the perkiest voices possible and a stylized graphic of the words "Legion Watch" appear at the bottom of the screen. Occasional clickable sidelinks pop up as the news show goes on.]
[After their peppy opening, Shellee and Tammee look excited to be presenting the news today. Probably because it's a doozy. Recent events will be dominating the news cycle for quite some time.]
Shellee: In a shocking turn of events, several members of the UP Council have been arrested for colluding with the omnicidal threat of Chronoblivion, and arrested by the Legion. This revelation has shaken to the UP to its core and investigations into the affairs of the Council-members has led to the mass arrests of dozens of government officials, judges, legal aides, and corrupt Science Police officers -- including the Chief of Cargg's Science Police division. Guards in Takron-Galtos were also arrested after evidence was found that suggested they had helped imprisoned ex-government officials from Harrub communicate with mercenaries that were aiding the corrupt Council-members.
Tammee: The Council-members were Meranu Vigo and Yelik Melinko of Cargg, Corl Dem and Tela Nik of Daxam, and Rina Tal and Lural Nol of Naltor. The UP has been shaken to the core by these arrests, which extend to almost every level of the government.
[Video is shown of the Council-members being dragged off by the Science Police on Brainiac 3's asteroid, after being handed over by the Legionnaires. The Naltorian and Carggite Council-members hang their heads in shame, but the Daxamites struggle and resist arrest (futiley because of the power restraints). Corl Dem cries out "Get your filthy hands off me! I know my rights!" More video is shown of similar arrests all around the UP -- in the UP Council hall on New Metropolis, in the Council-members' offices on Daxam, in the middle of a Science Police press conference on Cargg...]
[Click here for a list of arrested officials.]
Shellee: The corrupt Council-members are suspected to have contributed to several events that caused harm to the UP Council and the Legion of Superheroes, such as the attack by the Fatal Five on the historic accord between the Second Galaxy and the UP on Talok IV, the capture and imprisonment of Legionnaires on Murderworld after their investigation of UP prospective world Harrub, and the capture of several Legionnaires from a diplomatic event that nearly led to their televised execution.
[Click here for links to information about these incidents.]
Shellee: Ven Fig, commissioner of the Science Police, says President Winema Wazzo and her main staff have so far been cleared of any connections to the corrupt Council-members, and that the president had in fact instigated secret investigations into the potential corruption shortly after the events of the accord on Talok IV. President Wazzo had this to say:
[President Winema Wazzo is shown giving an address before the UP Council delegation and the press, and she looks pleased with current events.]
President Wazzo: While the infiltration of the UP government by the forces of Chronoblivion is a grave and alarming prospect, I am pleased to report that those responsible are being brought to justice, and that investigations into their activities could provide us with vital information to use against the threat facing the galaxy. These mass arrests and investigations would not have been possible with the efforts of the Legion of Superheroes, who provided proof of the Council-members' betrayal of the UP to the Science Police, and successfully took the Council-members and one of Chronoblivion's Heralds into custody.
Shellee: Various government and law enforcement officials have been comparing the arrest of these corrupt officials to the Legion's historic overthrow of President Jeanne Chu, the UP's first president, who was responsible for, among other crimes, instigating the war between Braal and Titan. Comparisons have also been made to their overthrow of infamous supervillain Ra's Al Ghul, who had secretly killed president Leland McCauley, and replaced him by wearing a hologram. Once again, the Legion has stepped in and admirably exposed corruption in the UP government, when all other parties failed.
Tammee: The Legionnaires also successfully detained one of Chronoblivion's Heralds, who identified herself as "War," and using special recording devices to overcome powers that rendered her immune to most forms of recording, provided video records to the Science Police of the Council-members' collusion with her.
[War is shown being led out of Brainiac 3's meteor base, heavily cuffed in power inhibitors and other restraints. Even despite her defeat, she's smiling in a slightly alarming way.]
[Click here for video proof of the Council-members' cooperation with the Herald.]
Shellee: Here on Legion Watch, we have obtained some exciting footage of the fight between the Legion, War, and the arrested Council-members.
[Video plays of Soldier 76 firing pulse fire into War's chest, and Locus rushing her and fighting hand to hand. Other fights are shown, such as the one against the Naltorians, where sniper fire (Widowmaker's work) destroys Nal's precognic enhancer. Nal is shown getting knocked out by the butt of Genji's sword. Council-member Tal is shown being shot by Elphelt and falling to the ground looking stunned. In the Daxamite fight, Wash fires stun rounds at Corl, Reaper is shown putting nonfatal rounds into Tela's back, and York charges one of their transuits with energy, causing an explosion that knocks both Council-members out.]
Tammee: Two hostages were recovered from the custody of the Council-members, and their identities -- and the implications of their return -- have led to widespread celebration through the UP.
[Video is shown of Cosmic Boy and Invisible Kid being led out of the meteor base. Invisible Kid looks dazed, and Cosmic Boy helps steady him with an arm around his shoulders. The two are quickly taken into the care of paramedics.]
Shellee: Legion Leader Kid Quantum addressed the UP in a press conference that announced the return of lost Legionnaires Cosmic Boy and Invisible Kid.
[Kid Q stands in front of the press, beaming.]
Kid Quantum: I am happy to report that Cosmic Boy and Invisible Kid are little shaken but otherwise in good health. They've had their identities verified by extensive scans. They also brought with them news that the Legion -- and most of the UP -- has been hoping to hear: the missing Legionnaires are now confirmed as alive.
[Chaos erupts at the press conference. Cheers, and expressions of shock, countless questions from the reporters. Kid Quantum holds up a hand to silence them all.]
Kid Quantum: According to Invisible Kid, the device that was meant to stop Mon-starr over a year ago was sabotaged during the fight by an unknown party -- one that we believe, due to the Joker's testimony, may have been one of Chronoblivion's Heralds. Invisible Kid was able to make a last minute repair that prevented it from destroying the Legion. However, it transported most of the team to a pocket dimension, where they've been trapped ever since the fight. Due to strange properties of that dimension, the missing Legionnaires have fortunately not needed any food or water, and are currently in good health. Invisible Kid reports that the worst thing they've faced while trapped there is extreme boredom, which is no surprise to anyone.
[The assembled reporters and crowd laugh.]
Kid Quantum: Thanks to the teamwork of the trapped Legionnaires, they were able to get Cosmic Boy and Invisible Kid out of the pocket dimension, in the hopes of sending them for help. We estimate that they freed themselves only days ago by our time, but due to travel in various alternate dimensions where time ran differently, it took Lyle and Rokk 6 months relative time to find their way through the multiverse to get back home. Now, questions?
Talokian Reporter: Kid Quantum, Vriss Limno, Daily Supernova. Does this mean the Brainiac 5 has been fully cleared of responsibility for causing the lost Legionnaires to go missing?
Kid Quantum: Invisible Kid said that the machine Brainiac created to defeat Mon-starr had initially been configured correctly. It was only after looking back at the device after looking away that he saw it had been tampered with, and thanks to Lyle's quick action, he was able to make a repair that kept it from killing the team, dimensionally displacing them instead. So yes, we have now completely verified that it wasn't a Legionnaire that was responsible for part of the team going missing. An unknown party discreetly sabotaged the device mid-mission, which matches the Joker's testimony.
Reporter Hannah Wells: Hannah Wells, EarthLive News. Does the Legion know if rescue of the other trapped Legionnaires will be possible, and if so, how long will it take?
Kid Quantum: After talking to Cosmic Boy and Invisible Kid, Brainy believes he can free the other trapped Legionnaires, but it could take some time. Weeks. Months. Even as long as a year. However, they are currently safe, and are currently in conditions that will keep them alive and comfortable until a solution can be found. No matter how long it takes, the most important thing is they are alive, and they're coming home.
Coluan Reporter: Kid Quantum, Lem Nox, Infostratix News. What happened to Invisible Kid and Cosmic Boy while they were in the possession of the corrupt Council-members?
Kid Quantum: [her expression goes a little grimmer] They were interrogated for information on the missing Legionnaires, and for intelligence that could potentially be used against the Legion. However, the telepaths under the employ of the Council-members failed to break their mental defenses, and they suffered minimal physical harm. They were about to be handed over to the Herald, which might have led to their torture and death at the hands of Chronoblivion's forces, but fortunately, the Legion was able to rescue them in time. The team that was responsible for their rescue consisted entirely of Legionnaires not from this universe, and Cos and Lyle are extremely grateful for their rescue. The team managed to get them away from the Council-members without any injury.
Shellee: You heard it here, ladies and gentle-beings! Invisible Kid and Cosmic Boy are back, and the missing Legionnaires are alive!
Tammee: In other news, the escape of an ancient supervillain known as Tsarista threw New Metropolis into chaos, as she transformed part into the city into a place where stories came alive. Newsdrones had trouble functioning in the bubble of altered reality, but caught a few glimpses of the Legionnaires as they were trapped in different stories brought to life. Legionnaires Nova Prime and Speedball fought against a monstrous clown -- while trapped in the form of children.
[Surrounded by red balloons coming out of a sewer, Rich and Robbie -- in the form of small children -- grab onto each other. In the sewer grate, there are eyes flashing from the dark and a painted face and the vaguest outline of teeth that are just slightly too sharp. The creature's voice is utterly inhuman, like it's just wearing a human skin.]
It: There's all kinds of wonderful things down here! Cotton candy, and rides, and all sorts of surprises. And balloons, too. All colors. [A balloon bobs up.] They all float down here.
Rich: RUN!
[The two run away from the grate, holding onto each other's hands. The scene flashes ahead to them standing on a porch, soaked and shivering, trying to figure out what to do.]
Robbie: What are we going to do? It can be anywhere. It is everywhere. This is the beginning of the book. Do we... do we skip ahead to the end?
Rich: I dunno, but whatever we do, we stick together. I don't care if any of the fake adults try to pull us apart. Starting now, we call a permanent sleepover. We need to make sure neither of us is ever alone. That's what it took, right? A bunch of kids sticking together, looking out for each other. We've already done that. We already were a bunch of dumb kids looking out for each other, it's just this time we don't have superpowers.
[The scene changes.]
Tammee: Meanwhile, Legionnaires Blue Falcon, Justice, and Great Saiyawoman found themselves embroiled in a more classic tale of derring-do, brainwashed into their roles.
[Videl is seen wearing a dress with a dramatically plunging neckline, and has a scepter and horns on her head, clearly cast into the role of the villain. Justice is the damsel of the piece, dressed up in a regal white and gold dress and tied to a chair. And Fareeha is the knight in shining armor.]
Videl Oh, you foolish hero. Trying to rescue my dear princess, are you?"
Fareeha: I don't try - I succeed. You'd be safer just relinquishing, ah -- [She pauses as she gets a look at the "princess"] -- relinquishing the prince to me!
Vance: You came!
Shellee: The Legionnaires managed to defeat the different scenarios they were in, leading to the evil queen weakening until she could no longer maintain the magic that had transformed the city. The Legion has stated that she was once again magically trapped.
Tammee: And now for a commercial break!
[A Coluan is shown wearing black, action movie type clothing, but worn down, like he's the survivor of a catastrophe. He's walking down a battle-damaged street in a post-apocalyptic setting, muttering calculations under his breath. The narrator that speaks up is somehow the same narrator that has always narrated action movie trailers, deep and throaty. Somehow, this is a universal constant, in every time and every universe.]
Narrator: In a world where math is outlawed, and the people suffer at the hands of mathless barbarians, one man will rise up. Quem Turlo.
[Some goons approach the Coluan with swords and blunt weapons.]
Goon 1: You're coming with us!
Quem Turlo: I know so many ways to kick your asses, I'd need to calculate them to the tenth power.
Goon 2: Yeah, right! And even if you could do it, math is outlawed here!
Goon 3: Get him!
[They attack, and he ducks, dodges, and parries, causing them to all hit each other with their weapons without him laying a hand on them. They all fall to the ground dead and he takes out sunglasses and puts them on, slowly walking away.]
Quem Turlo: When it comes to the scale of righteousness, that's what you get for being mean -- instead of median.
[Quem Turlo is shown fighting some bad guys on top of a hover-truck. His "math-vision" is shown, scrolling numbers and calculations. He kicks a crowbar out of a mook's hands, causing it to fly down and get knocked by a thruster up into the coolant tank, causing a leak. Then he parries and kicks an enemy's flamethrower so it gets pointed at the leaking coolant. It ignites and flames race up into the engine, which then explodes. He races forward just in time for the exploding hover truck to launch him into the air so he can tuck and roll over the railing of an overpass, landing in an open truck-bed filled with some kind of unidentifiable pads of squishy gloop.]
[An evil warlord is shown. A Robotican, naturally. The media isn't always great about Robotican media representation.]
Warlord: Bring me Quem Turlo! We can't let him bring math back to the masses or we'll lose control of them!
Coluan Mercenary: Quem Turlo! You're coming with me!
Quem Turlo: No. I'm coming for you. I'm going to Coluadd you to list of my defeated enemies!
[He fights the mercenary with nunchucks in the ravaged remains of an abandoned supermarket. After beating the man half to death in the bakery section, he draws 3.14159 in the rotten icing on some kind of alien fruit pie.]
Quem Turlo: It's time for you to eat a slice of humble pi.
[He slams the mercenary's face into the pie and suffocates him in it.]
Narrator: One man. One brain. 9 levels of intellect. Two nunchucks.
[The title screen flashes. "BLOOD (SIN)."]
Tammee: I'm Tammee Tim!
Shellee: And I'm Shellee Star!
Both: And you're back to watching Legion Watch!
Shellee: After the revelation of Brainiac 5's lack of involvement in the displacement of the missing Legionnaires, several organizations, such as the UP Science Council, are offering prestigious awards to the Coluan Legionnaire, in recognition of multiple scientific discoveries published within the last year.
Tammee: However, Legion PR reps have said the Coluan Legionnaire has quickly declined these award offers with a formal statement of...er: "Kindly [bleep] off."
Shellee: Quite the sassy response, Tammee!
Tammee: Indeed, Shellee! In other news, the Legion's victories against the corrupt Council-members and Chronoblivion, the return of Cosmic Boy and Invisible Kid, and the news of the missing Legionnaires' survival have led to spontaneous celebrations throughout the UP! We've sent newsdrones out on the streets of the UP to get the public's thoughts on recent Legion events.
[Various celebrations are shown through the UP, with people wearing Legion merchandise and waving signs. The classic Legionnaires are heavily represented because of the news, but so are the newbies. As usual.]
[A Carggite girl is shown being interviewed by a newsdrone. All of her selves are crying.]
Carggite Girl: Cosmic Boy's always been my favorite. I can't believe he's back! And it's all thanks to the displacee Legionnaires that he was saved. [She lifts up her sleeve to show a design newly tattooed on her shoulder.] I just got a tattoo of Genji because he helped saved him. Also, for an android -- or a cyborg? I don't know? -- he's so dreamy. Have you seen that butt?
[A drone interviews a winged Dryad.]
Newsdrone: Bzzt, what are your feelings on the discovery of corruption in the UP Council?
Dryad Woman: It's alarming, but I think it goes to show us how important the Legion is. So often, it's acted as a balancing agent in the UP, routing out corruption whenever the system fails. The Council-members that were captured weren't the only ones that voted to disband the Legion. Hopefully, this will lead to the Council unfreezing the ban on recruitment. Those displacee Legionnaires shouldn't have to be forced into this, and even the ones that choose to stay on the team shouldn't have to bear so much of the weight of protecting a universe that isn't theirs.
[A newsdrone seems to be trying to interview a Braalian man covered head to toe in Reaper merchandise, but he just keeps screaming Reaper's name over and over, until foaming at the mouth slightly in overexcitement, and falling to the ground crying.]
[Two Naltorian girls stand next to each other.]
Girl 1: After seeing that fight against the Daxamite Council-members, I just sort of want... Reaper and Freelancer and Locksmith like. Together.
Girl 2: Like. In a sandwich.
Girl 1: Yeah. In a sandwich.
[A Talokian girl is shown cosplaying as Ephelt.]
Newsdrone: Bzzt, why have you chosen to dress up as Guns-n-Roses?
Talokian Girl: I just love her look. And her superhero name. And her ferocity.
[Back to the studio where the two women are smiling over a very good news day.]
Shellee: And that was the word on the street! What an exciting day in Legion history!
Tammee: For more Legion action, be sure to keep tuning in! We'll be reporting on the ongoing investigations and prosecution of the corrupt officials, and updates on the progress of freeing the missing Legionnaires. This is Tammee Tim!
Shellee: And Shellee Star!
Both: And this was Legion Watch!
[ooc: You can feel free to have characters discuss the episode in the comments. These comments wouldn't be public, as they'd simply be on the feed post on the Legion's network.]
[Two women appear on the screen, sitting at a desk, their appearances altered by glam filters so that one is all pink hair and skin and sparkles, and the other is all in blues. They look pretty flashy and tacky but this is the future. Reporters don't exist anymore; they're "personalities" now. More serious news outlets have already reported on the Council-members; this is one of the fluffier retrospective programs that have aired.]
Shellee: I'm Shellee Star! [That would be the pink one.]
Tammee: And I'm Tammee Tim! [That would be the blue one.]
Together: And this is Legion Watch! [They say it in unison in the perkiest voices possible and a stylized graphic of the words "Legion Watch" appear at the bottom of the screen. Occasional clickable sidelinks pop up as the news show goes on.]
[After their peppy opening, Shellee and Tammee look excited to be presenting the news today. Probably because it's a doozy. Recent events will be dominating the news cycle for quite some time.]
Shellee: In a shocking turn of events, several members of the UP Council have been arrested for colluding with the omnicidal threat of Chronoblivion, and arrested by the Legion. This revelation has shaken to the UP to its core and investigations into the affairs of the Council-members has led to the mass arrests of dozens of government officials, judges, legal aides, and corrupt Science Police officers -- including the Chief of Cargg's Science Police division. Guards in Takron-Galtos were also arrested after evidence was found that suggested they had helped imprisoned ex-government officials from Harrub communicate with mercenaries that were aiding the corrupt Council-members.
Tammee: The Council-members were Meranu Vigo and Yelik Melinko of Cargg, Corl Dem and Tela Nik of Daxam, and Rina Tal and Lural Nol of Naltor. The UP has been shaken to the core by these arrests, which extend to almost every level of the government.
[Video is shown of the Council-members being dragged off by the Science Police on Brainiac 3's asteroid, after being handed over by the Legionnaires. The Naltorian and Carggite Council-members hang their heads in shame, but the Daxamites struggle and resist arrest (futiley because of the power restraints). Corl Dem cries out "Get your filthy hands off me! I know my rights!" More video is shown of similar arrests all around the UP -- in the UP Council hall on New Metropolis, in the Council-members' offices on Daxam, in the middle of a Science Police press conference on Cargg...]
[Click here for a list of arrested officials.]
Shellee: The corrupt Council-members are suspected to have contributed to several events that caused harm to the UP Council and the Legion of Superheroes, such as the attack by the Fatal Five on the historic accord between the Second Galaxy and the UP on Talok IV, the capture and imprisonment of Legionnaires on Murderworld after their investigation of UP prospective world Harrub, and the capture of several Legionnaires from a diplomatic event that nearly led to their televised execution.
[Click here for links to information about these incidents.]
Shellee: Ven Fig, commissioner of the Science Police, says President Winema Wazzo and her main staff have so far been cleared of any connections to the corrupt Council-members, and that the president had in fact instigated secret investigations into the potential corruption shortly after the events of the accord on Talok IV. President Wazzo had this to say:
[President Winema Wazzo is shown giving an address before the UP Council delegation and the press, and she looks pleased with current events.]
President Wazzo: While the infiltration of the UP government by the forces of Chronoblivion is a grave and alarming prospect, I am pleased to report that those responsible are being brought to justice, and that investigations into their activities could provide us with vital information to use against the threat facing the galaxy. These mass arrests and investigations would not have been possible with the efforts of the Legion of Superheroes, who provided proof of the Council-members' betrayal of the UP to the Science Police, and successfully took the Council-members and one of Chronoblivion's Heralds into custody.
Shellee: Various government and law enforcement officials have been comparing the arrest of these corrupt officials to the Legion's historic overthrow of President Jeanne Chu, the UP's first president, who was responsible for, among other crimes, instigating the war between Braal and Titan. Comparisons have also been made to their overthrow of infamous supervillain Ra's Al Ghul, who had secretly killed president Leland McCauley, and replaced him by wearing a hologram. Once again, the Legion has stepped in and admirably exposed corruption in the UP government, when all other parties failed.
Tammee: The Legionnaires also successfully detained one of Chronoblivion's Heralds, who identified herself as "War," and using special recording devices to overcome powers that rendered her immune to most forms of recording, provided video records to the Science Police of the Council-members' collusion with her.
[War is shown being led out of Brainiac 3's meteor base, heavily cuffed in power inhibitors and other restraints. Even despite her defeat, she's smiling in a slightly alarming way.]
[Click here for video proof of the Council-members' cooperation with the Herald.]
Shellee: Here on Legion Watch, we have obtained some exciting footage of the fight between the Legion, War, and the arrested Council-members.
[Video plays of Soldier 76 firing pulse fire into War's chest, and Locus rushing her and fighting hand to hand. Other fights are shown, such as the one against the Naltorians, where sniper fire (Widowmaker's work) destroys Nal's precognic enhancer. Nal is shown getting knocked out by the butt of Genji's sword. Council-member Tal is shown being shot by Elphelt and falling to the ground looking stunned. In the Daxamite fight, Wash fires stun rounds at Corl, Reaper is shown putting nonfatal rounds into Tela's back, and York charges one of their transuits with energy, causing an explosion that knocks both Council-members out.]
Tammee: Two hostages were recovered from the custody of the Council-members, and their identities -- and the implications of their return -- have led to widespread celebration through the UP.
[Video is shown of Cosmic Boy and Invisible Kid being led out of the meteor base. Invisible Kid looks dazed, and Cosmic Boy helps steady him with an arm around his shoulders. The two are quickly taken into the care of paramedics.]
Shellee: Legion Leader Kid Quantum addressed the UP in a press conference that announced the return of lost Legionnaires Cosmic Boy and Invisible Kid.
[Kid Q stands in front of the press, beaming.]
Kid Quantum: I am happy to report that Cosmic Boy and Invisible Kid are little shaken but otherwise in good health. They've had their identities verified by extensive scans. They also brought with them news that the Legion -- and most of the UP -- has been hoping to hear: the missing Legionnaires are now confirmed as alive.
[Chaos erupts at the press conference. Cheers, and expressions of shock, countless questions from the reporters. Kid Quantum holds up a hand to silence them all.]
Kid Quantum: According to Invisible Kid, the device that was meant to stop Mon-starr over a year ago was sabotaged during the fight by an unknown party -- one that we believe, due to the Joker's testimony, may have been one of Chronoblivion's Heralds. Invisible Kid was able to make a last minute repair that prevented it from destroying the Legion. However, it transported most of the team to a pocket dimension, where they've been trapped ever since the fight. Due to strange properties of that dimension, the missing Legionnaires have fortunately not needed any food or water, and are currently in good health. Invisible Kid reports that the worst thing they've faced while trapped there is extreme boredom, which is no surprise to anyone.
[The assembled reporters and crowd laugh.]
Kid Quantum: Thanks to the teamwork of the trapped Legionnaires, they were able to get Cosmic Boy and Invisible Kid out of the pocket dimension, in the hopes of sending them for help. We estimate that they freed themselves only days ago by our time, but due to travel in various alternate dimensions where time ran differently, it took Lyle and Rokk 6 months relative time to find their way through the multiverse to get back home. Now, questions?
Talokian Reporter: Kid Quantum, Vriss Limno, Daily Supernova. Does this mean the Brainiac 5 has been fully cleared of responsibility for causing the lost Legionnaires to go missing?
Kid Quantum: Invisible Kid said that the machine Brainiac created to defeat Mon-starr had initially been configured correctly. It was only after looking back at the device after looking away that he saw it had been tampered with, and thanks to Lyle's quick action, he was able to make a repair that kept it from killing the team, dimensionally displacing them instead. So yes, we have now completely verified that it wasn't a Legionnaire that was responsible for part of the team going missing. An unknown party discreetly sabotaged the device mid-mission, which matches the Joker's testimony.
Reporter Hannah Wells: Hannah Wells, EarthLive News. Does the Legion know if rescue of the other trapped Legionnaires will be possible, and if so, how long will it take?
Kid Quantum: After talking to Cosmic Boy and Invisible Kid, Brainy believes he can free the other trapped Legionnaires, but it could take some time. Weeks. Months. Even as long as a year. However, they are currently safe, and are currently in conditions that will keep them alive and comfortable until a solution can be found. No matter how long it takes, the most important thing is they are alive, and they're coming home.
Coluan Reporter: Kid Quantum, Lem Nox, Infostratix News. What happened to Invisible Kid and Cosmic Boy while they were in the possession of the corrupt Council-members?
Kid Quantum: [her expression goes a little grimmer] They were interrogated for information on the missing Legionnaires, and for intelligence that could potentially be used against the Legion. However, the telepaths under the employ of the Council-members failed to break their mental defenses, and they suffered minimal physical harm. They were about to be handed over to the Herald, which might have led to their torture and death at the hands of Chronoblivion's forces, but fortunately, the Legion was able to rescue them in time. The team that was responsible for their rescue consisted entirely of Legionnaires not from this universe, and Cos and Lyle are extremely grateful for their rescue. The team managed to get them away from the Council-members without any injury.
Shellee: You heard it here, ladies and gentle-beings! Invisible Kid and Cosmic Boy are back, and the missing Legionnaires are alive!
Tammee: In other news, the escape of an ancient supervillain known as Tsarista threw New Metropolis into chaos, as she transformed part into the city into a place where stories came alive. Newsdrones had trouble functioning in the bubble of altered reality, but caught a few glimpses of the Legionnaires as they were trapped in different stories brought to life. Legionnaires Nova Prime and Speedball fought against a monstrous clown -- while trapped in the form of children.
[Surrounded by red balloons coming out of a sewer, Rich and Robbie -- in the form of small children -- grab onto each other. In the sewer grate, there are eyes flashing from the dark and a painted face and the vaguest outline of teeth that are just slightly too sharp. The creature's voice is utterly inhuman, like it's just wearing a human skin.]
It: There's all kinds of wonderful things down here! Cotton candy, and rides, and all sorts of surprises. And balloons, too. All colors. [A balloon bobs up.] They all float down here.
Rich: RUN!
[The two run away from the grate, holding onto each other's hands. The scene flashes ahead to them standing on a porch, soaked and shivering, trying to figure out what to do.]
Robbie: What are we going to do? It can be anywhere. It is everywhere. This is the beginning of the book. Do we... do we skip ahead to the end?
Rich: I dunno, but whatever we do, we stick together. I don't care if any of the fake adults try to pull us apart. Starting now, we call a permanent sleepover. We need to make sure neither of us is ever alone. That's what it took, right? A bunch of kids sticking together, looking out for each other. We've already done that. We already were a bunch of dumb kids looking out for each other, it's just this time we don't have superpowers.
[The scene changes.]
Tammee: Meanwhile, Legionnaires Blue Falcon, Justice, and Great Saiyawoman found themselves embroiled in a more classic tale of derring-do, brainwashed into their roles.
[Videl is seen wearing a dress with a dramatically plunging neckline, and has a scepter and horns on her head, clearly cast into the role of the villain. Justice is the damsel of the piece, dressed up in a regal white and gold dress and tied to a chair. And Fareeha is the knight in shining armor.]
Videl Oh, you foolish hero. Trying to rescue my dear princess, are you?"
Fareeha: I don't try - I succeed. You'd be safer just relinquishing, ah -- [She pauses as she gets a look at the "princess"] -- relinquishing the prince to me!
Vance: You came!
Shellee: The Legionnaires managed to defeat the different scenarios they were in, leading to the evil queen weakening until she could no longer maintain the magic that had transformed the city. The Legion has stated that she was once again magically trapped.
Tammee: And now for a commercial break!
[A Coluan is shown wearing black, action movie type clothing, but worn down, like he's the survivor of a catastrophe. He's walking down a battle-damaged street in a post-apocalyptic setting, muttering calculations under his breath. The narrator that speaks up is somehow the same narrator that has always narrated action movie trailers, deep and throaty. Somehow, this is a universal constant, in every time and every universe.]
Narrator: In a world where math is outlawed, and the people suffer at the hands of mathless barbarians, one man will rise up. Quem Turlo.
[Some goons approach the Coluan with swords and blunt weapons.]
Goon 1: You're coming with us!
Quem Turlo: I know so many ways to kick your asses, I'd need to calculate them to the tenth power.
Goon 2: Yeah, right! And even if you could do it, math is outlawed here!
Goon 3: Get him!
[They attack, and he ducks, dodges, and parries, causing them to all hit each other with their weapons without him laying a hand on them. They all fall to the ground dead and he takes out sunglasses and puts them on, slowly walking away.]
Quem Turlo: When it comes to the scale of righteousness, that's what you get for being mean -- instead of median.
[Quem Turlo is shown fighting some bad guys on top of a hover-truck. His "math-vision" is shown, scrolling numbers and calculations. He kicks a crowbar out of a mook's hands, causing it to fly down and get knocked by a thruster up into the coolant tank, causing a leak. Then he parries and kicks an enemy's flamethrower so it gets pointed at the leaking coolant. It ignites and flames race up into the engine, which then explodes. He races forward just in time for the exploding hover truck to launch him into the air so he can tuck and roll over the railing of an overpass, landing in an open truck-bed filled with some kind of unidentifiable pads of squishy gloop.]
[An evil warlord is shown. A Robotican, naturally. The media isn't always great about Robotican media representation.]
Warlord: Bring me Quem Turlo! We can't let him bring math back to the masses or we'll lose control of them!
Coluan Mercenary: Quem Turlo! You're coming with me!
Quem Turlo: No. I'm coming for you. I'm going to Coluadd you to list of my defeated enemies!
[He fights the mercenary with nunchucks in the ravaged remains of an abandoned supermarket. After beating the man half to death in the bakery section, he draws 3.14159 in the rotten icing on some kind of alien fruit pie.]
Quem Turlo: It's time for you to eat a slice of humble pi.
[He slams the mercenary's face into the pie and suffocates him in it.]
Narrator: One man. One brain. 9 levels of intellect. Two nunchucks.
[The title screen flashes. "BLOOD (SIN)."]
Tammee: I'm Tammee Tim!
Shellee: And I'm Shellee Star!
Both: And you're back to watching Legion Watch!
Shellee: After the revelation of Brainiac 5's lack of involvement in the displacement of the missing Legionnaires, several organizations, such as the UP Science Council, are offering prestigious awards to the Coluan Legionnaire, in recognition of multiple scientific discoveries published within the last year.
Tammee: However, Legion PR reps have said the Coluan Legionnaire has quickly declined these award offers with a formal statement of...er: "Kindly [bleep] off."
Shellee: Quite the sassy response, Tammee!
Tammee: Indeed, Shellee! In other news, the Legion's victories against the corrupt Council-members and Chronoblivion, the return of Cosmic Boy and Invisible Kid, and the news of the missing Legionnaires' survival have led to spontaneous celebrations throughout the UP! We've sent newsdrones out on the streets of the UP to get the public's thoughts on recent Legion events.
[Various celebrations are shown through the UP, with people wearing Legion merchandise and waving signs. The classic Legionnaires are heavily represented because of the news, but so are the newbies. As usual.]
[A Carggite girl is shown being interviewed by a newsdrone. All of her selves are crying.]
Carggite Girl: Cosmic Boy's always been my favorite. I can't believe he's back! And it's all thanks to the displacee Legionnaires that he was saved. [She lifts up her sleeve to show a design newly tattooed on her shoulder.] I just got a tattoo of Genji because he helped saved him. Also, for an android -- or a cyborg? I don't know? -- he's so dreamy. Have you seen that butt?
[A drone interviews a winged Dryad.]
Newsdrone: Bzzt, what are your feelings on the discovery of corruption in the UP Council?
Dryad Woman: It's alarming, but I think it goes to show us how important the Legion is. So often, it's acted as a balancing agent in the UP, routing out corruption whenever the system fails. The Council-members that were captured weren't the only ones that voted to disband the Legion. Hopefully, this will lead to the Council unfreezing the ban on recruitment. Those displacee Legionnaires shouldn't have to be forced into this, and even the ones that choose to stay on the team shouldn't have to bear so much of the weight of protecting a universe that isn't theirs.
[A newsdrone seems to be trying to interview a Braalian man covered head to toe in Reaper merchandise, but he just keeps screaming Reaper's name over and over, until foaming at the mouth slightly in overexcitement, and falling to the ground crying.]
[Two Naltorian girls stand next to each other.]
Girl 1: After seeing that fight against the Daxamite Council-members, I just sort of want... Reaper and Freelancer and Locksmith like. Together.
Girl 2: Like. In a sandwich.
Girl 1: Yeah. In a sandwich.
[A Talokian girl is shown cosplaying as Ephelt.]
Newsdrone: Bzzt, why have you chosen to dress up as Guns-n-Roses?
Talokian Girl: I just love her look. And her superhero name. And her ferocity.
[Back to the studio where the two women are smiling over a very good news day.]
Shellee: And that was the word on the street! What an exciting day in Legion history!
Tammee: For more Legion action, be sure to keep tuning in! We'll be reporting on the ongoing investigations and prosecution of the corrupt officials, and updates on the progress of freeing the missing Legionnaires. This is Tammee Tim!
Shellee: And Shellee Star!
Both: And this was Legion Watch!
[ooc: You can feel free to have characters discuss the episode in the comments. These comments wouldn't be public, as they'd simply be on the feed post on the Legion's network.]