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thelegion2016-03-20 06:46 am
legionnpcs) wrote in thelegion2016-03-20 06:46 am
Legion Watch | 001 [video]
[The Legion World staff maintains a feed of all Legion-related media so Legionnaires can be kept abreast of any reporting that's done on them. A segment has aired on Neutrino News about the Legionnaires and their rescue of the UP Council.
[Two women appear on the screen, sitting at a desk, their appearances altered by glam filters so that one is all pink hair and skin and sparkles, and the other is all in blues. They look pretty flashy and tacky but this is the future. Reporters don't exist anymore; they're "personalities" now.]
Shellee: I'm Shellee Star! [That would be the pink one.]
Tammee: And I'm Tammee Tim! [That would be the blue one.]
Together: And this is Legion Watch! [They say it in unison in the perkiest voices possible and a stylized graphic of the words "Legion Watch" appear at the bottom of the screen. Occasional clickable sidelinks pop up as the news show goes on.]
Shellee: After an attack on the UP Council earlier today by Xanthan terrorists named Proton and Neutron, authorities are crediting the Legion of Superheroes with yet another daring rescue!
Tammee: But in a surprise twist, it appears that the group of Legionnaires responsible for the rescue were not experienced Legionnaires. Rather, it was a group of the Legion's new rookies stepping up to the plate.
Shellee: Ever since the Legion reported that dimensionally displaced sentients have joined the team after appearing at the site of the full team's last battle, they've been hush hush about their new recruits, only offering the bare minimum they're required to disclose to public record: basic names, codenames, and pictures.
[Link here for info on Legion recruiting sanctions.]
Tammee: So we're providing exclusive first footage of the new Legionnaires in action!
[Footage starts flashing on the screen, culled from the many cameras in the capitol building (all of which are accessible to public record). They're carefully edited for maximum style. There's a voiceover of the two commentating.]
Shellee: Here we have Green Lantern Hal Jordan defending Council members, staff, and civilians and helping them escape the locked Council Hall.
Tammee: Now there's a name straight out of the history vids! Hal Jordan is rumored to be the same Hal Jordan who once fought side by side with such legends as Superman, Wonder Woman, and the greatest Green Lantern of them all: Guy Gardner.
Shellee: And here the Great Saiyaman came in to blast Proton to distract him. Look at that teamwork!
Tammee: Then Spider Woman shot some webbing in his face. Looks like it's lights out for Proton!
Shellee: Great Saiyaman turned up the heat here, blasting Proton so much that it broke through his energy blasts and damaged his armor.
Tammee: The young heartthrob is already trending high in hotness popularity polls with youths aged 14 to 21, reaching numbers only previously achieved by ultra hunk Ultra Boy, one of the Legionnaires that tragically lost their lives last year. Rumor has it that Gohan's single, ladies and gentlemen and variations thereupon!
[Link here for past poll trends.]
[Link here for more photos of that Gohan goodness.]
Shellee: Spider Woman went in for the KO here. One, two, and Proton is down! That has got to hurt!
Tammee: An amazing end to the fight, courtesy of Spider Woman.
Shellee: Netizens are already making comparisons between Spider Woman and lost Legionnaire Apparition, who was known for her phasing and hard-hitting, fight-ending fists. While Spider Woman doesn't phase, she sure seems to have a mean right hook!
[The video loops to show the knockout punch three more times and the scene goes back to the women at their desk.]
[Link here for archive footage of Lost Legionnaire Apparition for comparison.]
Shellee: Speaking of hooks, anyone who wants to be hooked on flavor should try Soyleos, the nutrient crackers with attitude, proud sponsors of Neutrino News! Now available in four exciting flavors: plain, chocolate, vanilla, and snozzleberry! Soyleos, a perfect part of a balanced morning meal!
[A short graphic plays of a box of Soyleos exploding in a multicolored explosion.]
Tammee: Now back to some Legion action!
[Video of the other fight starts to play.]
Shellee: Neutron fared no better against Legionnaires Ladybug, Sovereign and Thaddeus Thawne, whose codename we haven't been provided.
Tammee: Thad immediately pushed the fight in the Legion's favor by attacking Neutron with superspeed. Perhaps Thaddeus should consider 'Kid Flash' as codename. [She laughs even though it's not a joke.]
Shellee: He certainly looks like he'd fit in with the Flash family of heroes from history!
Tammee: While Thad damaged Neutron's armor and kept him distracted, Legionnaire Ladybug got the drop on the villain, smashing open his helmet and causing some serious damage.
[Ladybug does some fancy flips to avoid some blows and explosive rings in the video.]
Shellee: Look at those moves! Looks like this isn't Ladybug's first time at the robo-rodeo!
Tammee: It seems that Thad then helped Sovereign get in close enough to Neutron to use some kind of telepathic power to make him stand down long enough to be subdued by Science Police.
Shellee: Debate is already brewing among netizens on whether or not the Legionnaire should be required to wear the mark of Titan, required of all Titanian telepaths. Some are arguing that even though he's from another universe, that no one should be exempt. Others believe that a guest of the UP shouldn't be forced to, especially since this power may not be true telepathy and is now publicly known
Tammee: Given that Sovereign isn't technically a UP citizen, it's a complicated situation, to be sure!
[Link here for info on the UP's telepath identification requirements.]
Shellee: But back to the fight! Judging from how comfortable Thad and Sovereign look together in the fight, one wonders if there's more between the two than just teamwork.
[The video loops again, showing Thad carrying Saralegui.]
Tammee: Canny eyewitnesses also spotted Thad at the Hall of Justice Museum earlier in the day getting awfully cozy with Ladybug. Could a love triangle be brewing?
Shellee: You'll have to keep watching Legion Watch to find out!
Tammee: Let's just hope with recruits this promising that Brainiac 5 doesn't disappear them first!
Shellee: [laughs] Tammee, you are so bad!
Tammee: For more Legion action, be sure to keep tuning in. This is Tammee Tim!
Shellee: And Shellee Star!
Together: And this was Legion Watch!
[Two women appear on the screen, sitting at a desk, their appearances altered by glam filters so that one is all pink hair and skin and sparkles, and the other is all in blues. They look pretty flashy and tacky but this is the future. Reporters don't exist anymore; they're "personalities" now.]
Shellee: I'm Shellee Star! [That would be the pink one.]
Tammee: And I'm Tammee Tim! [That would be the blue one.]
Together: And this is Legion Watch! [They say it in unison in the perkiest voices possible and a stylized graphic of the words "Legion Watch" appear at the bottom of the screen. Occasional clickable sidelinks pop up as the news show goes on.]
Shellee: After an attack on the UP Council earlier today by Xanthan terrorists named Proton and Neutron, authorities are crediting the Legion of Superheroes with yet another daring rescue!
Tammee: But in a surprise twist, it appears that the group of Legionnaires responsible for the rescue were not experienced Legionnaires. Rather, it was a group of the Legion's new rookies stepping up to the plate.
Shellee: Ever since the Legion reported that dimensionally displaced sentients have joined the team after appearing at the site of the full team's last battle, they've been hush hush about their new recruits, only offering the bare minimum they're required to disclose to public record: basic names, codenames, and pictures.
[Link here for info on Legion recruiting sanctions.]
Tammee: So we're providing exclusive first footage of the new Legionnaires in action!
[Footage starts flashing on the screen, culled from the many cameras in the capitol building (all of which are accessible to public record). They're carefully edited for maximum style. There's a voiceover of the two commentating.]
Shellee: Here we have Green Lantern Hal Jordan defending Council members, staff, and civilians and helping them escape the locked Council Hall.
Tammee: Now there's a name straight out of the history vids! Hal Jordan is rumored to be the same Hal Jordan who once fought side by side with such legends as Superman, Wonder Woman, and the greatest Green Lantern of them all: Guy Gardner.
Shellee: And here the Great Saiyaman came in to blast Proton to distract him. Look at that teamwork!
Tammee: Then Spider Woman shot some webbing in his face. Looks like it's lights out for Proton!
Shellee: Great Saiyaman turned up the heat here, blasting Proton so much that it broke through his energy blasts and damaged his armor.
Tammee: The young heartthrob is already trending high in hotness popularity polls with youths aged 14 to 21, reaching numbers only previously achieved by ultra hunk Ultra Boy, one of the Legionnaires that tragically lost their lives last year. Rumor has it that Gohan's single, ladies and gentlemen and variations thereupon!
[Link here for past poll trends.]
[Link here for more photos of that Gohan goodness.]
Shellee: Spider Woman went in for the KO here. One, two, and Proton is down! That has got to hurt!
Tammee: An amazing end to the fight, courtesy of Spider Woman.
Shellee: Netizens are already making comparisons between Spider Woman and lost Legionnaire Apparition, who was known for her phasing and hard-hitting, fight-ending fists. While Spider Woman doesn't phase, she sure seems to have a mean right hook!
[The video loops to show the knockout punch three more times and the scene goes back to the women at their desk.]
[Link here for archive footage of Lost Legionnaire Apparition for comparison.]
Shellee: Speaking of hooks, anyone who wants to be hooked on flavor should try Soyleos, the nutrient crackers with attitude, proud sponsors of Neutrino News! Now available in four exciting flavors: plain, chocolate, vanilla, and snozzleberry! Soyleos, a perfect part of a balanced morning meal!
[A short graphic plays of a box of Soyleos exploding in a multicolored explosion.]
Tammee: Now back to some Legion action!
[Video of the other fight starts to play.]
Shellee: Neutron fared no better against Legionnaires Ladybug, Sovereign and Thaddeus Thawne, whose codename we haven't been provided.
Tammee: Thad immediately pushed the fight in the Legion's favor by attacking Neutron with superspeed. Perhaps Thaddeus should consider 'Kid Flash' as codename. [She laughs even though it's not a joke.]
Shellee: He certainly looks like he'd fit in with the Flash family of heroes from history!
Tammee: While Thad damaged Neutron's armor and kept him distracted, Legionnaire Ladybug got the drop on the villain, smashing open his helmet and causing some serious damage.
[Ladybug does some fancy flips to avoid some blows and explosive rings in the video.]
Shellee: Look at those moves! Looks like this isn't Ladybug's first time at the robo-rodeo!
Tammee: It seems that Thad then helped Sovereign get in close enough to Neutron to use some kind of telepathic power to make him stand down long enough to be subdued by Science Police.
Shellee: Debate is already brewing among netizens on whether or not the Legionnaire should be required to wear the mark of Titan, required of all Titanian telepaths. Some are arguing that even though he's from another universe, that no one should be exempt. Others believe that a guest of the UP shouldn't be forced to, especially since this power may not be true telepathy and is now publicly known
Tammee: Given that Sovereign isn't technically a UP citizen, it's a complicated situation, to be sure!
[Link here for info on the UP's telepath identification requirements.]
Shellee: But back to the fight! Judging from how comfortable Thad and Sovereign look together in the fight, one wonders if there's more between the two than just teamwork.
[The video loops again, showing Thad carrying Saralegui.]
Tammee: Canny eyewitnesses also spotted Thad at the Hall of Justice Museum earlier in the day getting awfully cozy with Ladybug. Could a love triangle be brewing?
Shellee: You'll have to keep watching Legion Watch to find out!
Tammee: Let's just hope with recruits this promising that Brainiac 5 doesn't disappear them first!
Shellee: [laughs] Tammee, you are so bad!
Tammee: For more Legion action, be sure to keep tuning in. This is Tammee Tim!
Shellee: And Shellee Star!
Together: And this was Legion Watch!